Memorial benches

Some uniformed poster stated that nearly all the beauty spots she visited were ruined by a plethora or benches.

I mentioned Snowdon, Ben Nevis, Scafell Pike, the New Forest, the Forest of Dean and other areas of natural beauty and sarcastically suggested that these were littered with benches. Of course they are not.

Let me put some of you straight there are no benches up Snowdon

My feelings exactly MissA.

I'd be quite offended if people didn't eat their lunch, change their babies, and sit their bums on the bench in memory of my mum. That's what its for: so the living can rest awhile, and maybe think "thanks Jean!"

The last time we were at Beamish my husband needed to sit down and all the benches were full. We had to hold him up until we managed to get someone to help us up to the car park. That was the last time he was out of the house under his own steam.
After he died 3 months later, we paid for a bench at Beamish in his name.
We don't mind other people sitting on his bench. We quite often have conversations with other people having picnics on his bench. There's enough space for five people to sit on it.
Lovely views from it, too, of the Georgian railway, and we can watch all the building that is still going on.
I can't walk as well as I could six years ago, so am grateful for it being there whenever we go to Beamish.
We also gave money to three charities, and still do, connected to the reason he died, and we have bought half an acre of Woodland Trust land in his name, but with no plaques.
There are lots of ways of commemorating someone's death, and I think it is mean to object to any of these ways if it gives comfort to the families.

Living in the southwest I am fortunate to have coastal walks within reach and can assure you it is not always to admire the views but young holidaymakers eating their takeaways or sandwiches ice creams and horror of horrors even one young mother changing her child's nappy on one of them. Surely we can remember our loved and departed in more ways than this

I am not sure what SarahHellenWhitney is objecting to here. People enjoying themselves? Shock horror, changing a nappy?
Where does she suggest the young mum does that- on the ground?
And as for bodily contact with bottoms actually sitting on the benches, whatever next?

If you cannot climb Snowdon to the top without using lots of benches you are probably not fit enough and should not try.

I don't like the dead flowers that get left on parts of the roads where there have been accidents.
If people do want to leave flowers they should at least remove all the plastic wrapping. and take it home with them.

I live on the coast and there are many memorial benches on seafronts and beauty spots. They are in memory of local people who have often done wonderful work to help keep the area lovely. The elderly and disabled are very grateful of the benches, in Summer they become full of visitors very quickly and the more there are the greater the chance of getting somewhere to sit down and enjoy the fresh air view. Not everyone can sit on the grass or on walls, the elderly need somewhere with support to sit. These benches are not really an eyesore, they are made of solid wood and the plaques are paid for to the council. The council would never allow something that is an eyesore. The only people who might object are local cafes or restaurants who would prefer visitors spending money within their walls in place of sitting and enjoying the fresh air. If visitors object then go somewhere else. They will probably find something wrong there too. Can't please everybody.

I love these benches, as I'm always ready for a sit down! I took a pic of this one in Robin Hoods Bay. I find them poignant.

We live in a very rural area and like to walk around our fields and lanes. As we're not that young or fit I would really appreciate finding a memorial bench (or anything to sit on), preferably every mile or so along the way.

Perhaps (with permission of the donors) some of the surplus benches could be moved to a place where they'd be appreciated.

Esspee the only time we leave flowers on our bench (and I suspect this is the same in the majority of cases) is on an anniversary.

Try for some understanding and compassion please.

It's amazing what some people can object to.

Isn’t it just Alison

As for this idea that they are ‘proliferating’ like rabbits, I’ve never seen this but then I’ve never been to Whitby!

It's amazing what some people can object to. Apart from making the mourners feel that they have shown respect to their loved ones,who may well have valued the view when alive, believe me that when arthritis strikes a keen walker, the main objective is to get to the next place where I can sit down. Those not afflicted cannot imagine what it is like not to be able to reach the ground other than by throwing oneself down and then being unable to get up again!

I was on holiday in the French Alps about eight years ago and we took a walk up to a nearby bridge that was placed over a gorge . We saw several memorial plaques and flowers on the bridge . That was depressing .

Coco51 you miss the point, nobody is objecting to a reasonable number of benches, its just that in some places they are proliferating to an unreasonable degree.

Small plaques are acceptable but I object to the way some families use the benches to leave flower arrangements etc. This should not be allowed.

We're staying near the riverbank/seafront at Southend. Really enjoying the opportunity to walk along the cliffs pathways, and being able to sit down at times on the many memorial benches. And watching the ships and boats going up and down the Thames with the changing of the tides.

Would it occur to you that people who have mobility problems welcome the opportunity to sit down? So many beautiful places are off limits if there is nowhere to sit and rest

Thanks, OldMeg, for your helpful and informed response. Take my hat off to you for your supreme fastidiousness even in the face of complications. Well done you.

Is it just me that likes to sit on a memorial bench; admire the view and think about Mildred/Reg or Joy and offer a silent thank you to them for proving a place to sit a while? Lots of other things freak me out, but a memorial bench? Meh!

I'm not a fan of either memorials or flowers, I would prefer donations to my favourite Charity as we did for my DH, DF & much beloved Step-F.

I have no objections to benches if that is what the family wish to do but dislike too many of them. They are useful as long as they are kept usable. There is nothing more sad than a bench falling into disrepair because no-one is responsible for the upkeep.

Haven't seen too many benches on Anglesey but the odd one is usually very welcome after a few miles of cliff path walking. I do read the little plaque and generally agree with the person remembered by it. All the views are spectacular here.
I imagine there could well be too many in some places, I like the idea of a post or small wall where people can contribute to the maintenance and have a plaque added.
I do dislike the roadside bunches of plastic flowers or tatty plastic that once held fresh flowers. Plant some bulbs by all means. A memorial that gives you comfort and gives pleasure to others is fine by me.
Personally I will be adding instructions in my will for a litter bin on my favourite stretch of path. Inspired idea Dumpling. I don't need a plaque, hopefully those who knew me will carry my name in their heart.......... for a while at least.

I like them. I have been to Whitby twice but have never been able to climb up to the Abbey so wasn't aware of the 80 or so benches. It does seem a bit much, but then Whitby is a beautiful place and means so much to so many people. I like the idea of people “sharing” benches and also the litter bin idea!
There have always been little “shrines” for people in Ireland but I can’t remember them having lots of flowers wrapped in plastic - horrible.
I hated that sea of flowers after Diana died but then I wasn’t her biggest fan ...

I like them I don't see what harm there is in them and if others can rest on them and the family find comfort from them where's the harm