Spitting feathers!!

My Suggestion....
Have a photo plaque put on the headstone of the deceased together with a photo plaque of flowers as a permanent tribute.
I wouldn't put any inflamitary message as the headstone could be damaged in retaliation.

My father's flower holder has disappeared twice, you can order another from the office, but I suspect that if one gets lost or broken some people just 'help themselves' from a grave nearby. Very upsetting!

There are all sorts of miniscule covert cameras available. I would be tempted to buy one and set it up.

I was having this conversation with my daughter last week at my parents grave.People that steal from graves to put onto their own loved ones are the lowest of the low.

The cause of all this low level crime has little to do with policing and patrolling and much to do with a modern concept of selfishness and lack of any consideration for others. As a child I remember one park keeper in our large local park - he was there mainly to chat to children, put plasters on knees if necessary, and give directions. The park, in a deprived area of London, was immaculate and never vandalised; it was OUR park and we would not have dreamt of spoiling it. Recently the same park was mentioned in the local paper as dozens of daffodils were pulled up by two children 'playing' while the parents looked on and did nothing, and then abused anyone who commented. How times have changed.

Could it be an animal - I've heard of foxes stealing odd shoes?

I read about this only last week .....apparently it is happening a lot now, near to Christmas .....low life are stealing wreaths and flowers and selling them from stalls they set up at boot sales and markets ...and who is to know where they come from ? Some people have suggested tying them on with wire (but it can be cut !) or alarming them (but who would hear it >),,,,,,,perhaps some smart water sprayed on them ....but then who would be able to find them anyway !........better still have a little plaque made and fixed to the grave denoting that in memory of a loved one you have made a donation to his.favourite charity at Christmas .......so there will be no flowers or wreaths to steal ......sadly no one patrols anymore ....you could take a photo with the date and time showing, when you leave the tributes there .....don't suppose the Police or Cemetery would take much notice but at least you would have proof !

Can you use some Gorilla glue to secure it down?

So sad but there are, unfortunately, many sick individuals with nothing worth while in their sick lives.
Though this doesn't help you and the others who have been unfortunate to have had this done to them then unless they are caught in the act then notices put up will be water off a ducks back.

There aren’t enough words to describe these pond scum.

How sad for you and all the other people who are affected. So wrong.

What on earth do people get from stealing from a grave???

Even if these low life's are caught and charged what happens to them is no deterrent and they clearly have no shame so a court appearance won't affect them either.

I like what Conni7 said about changing places :-) May be some nasty smelly dye on the pots might help - just a thought.

Just hope you aren't too hurt by this but I'd be angry too.

Best Wishes and hope you find an answer to this problem.

My brother died very young in 2006 and it was a huge shock to me. I visited his grave regularly and about six weeks after his death I was at his graveside sorting out flowers when someone stole my handbag. I had my back turned just slightly and my bag was by my side. I didn’t see anyone or hear anyone and neither did my husband who had gone to fill the flower holder with fresh water. It took me months to recover from the shock and I later discovered that many others had experienced the same.

People can be just despicable. I have decided on cremation and no memorial whatsoever just to thwart the buggers.

It might be worth going to a local boot sale to see if there is a stall selling the stolen grave pots.

That is very sad to think this sort of thing happens, but I have heard of this before sometimes by over ambitious cemetery workers although it could be other people stealing them. We now take seasonal bulbs and plant them, no worrying about keeping them watered as nature helps with that. Perhaps if you just take flowers rather than a wreath and keep a supply of used jars at home specifically for this purpose. Hope this problem is soon cleared up for you though.

Yes, same problem here....but I have since found out that its the grounds maintenance people in my case...when their mowing the grass, everything gets knocked out of the way, never to be seen again, or damaged. Its clear in the rules that we should not leave things on the grass, as quite a number of people do. However, it does not answer the question as to where the flower holders from the actual stone go! I have taken mine away and grow flowers from the hole that is left which seems to work, except the heads of the daffodils in spring seem to be cut off every time!!

Horrible. Doesn't happen at DH's parents grave in a big city so not everywhere. So sad.

This is sick. To steal from a grave is beneath contempt. You have my sympathy. To think I get annoyed when the council remove Christmas wreaths on Jan 6th and throw them away even if they are still fresh. Just a thought but could they be blowing away in rough wind? A couple of times I have noticed my Mums water pot has blown around when it has been windy.

I've heard of flowers being taken to be used as "bouquets" to be given as a gift. Can you imagine receiving one, but perhaps the relatives of these people think it's ok to do. We really do need CCTV, everywhere as far as I'm concerned.

The main cause of all this antisocial low-level crime imho is CUTS in spending. It means places that used to have staff patroling, parks too, which would have been a deterrent, no longer have enough staff to do it. Not only does this decrease supervision levels, but also increases the number of unemployed people who could have done these unskilled jobs, and by knock on effect increases the number of people at a loose end and available to perpetrate these nuisances. I think austerity breeds austerity.

Do you think you could put a notice on the grave "Would you like to change places with me?" Might make them think, if they are capable. I read somewhere that someone put a notice on a car parked in a disability spot "You have my space. Would you like my disability?"

Theoddbird Not as far as I am aware. I am assuming these thefts happen at night and all the local authority say is that they do lock the gates - the problem is the gates are less than shoulder height at the tallest part and around waist height at the lowest and can easily be climbed over - I think even I could manage it!

I think stealing from and the vandalisation of graves is a burgeoning problem in a lot of towns. The cemetery where my son-in-law is buried is fairly tucked away, but overlooked by very busy allotments. Anyone would get short shrift if they interfered with the graves because the allotment holders wouldn't stand for it.

Are there any CCTV cameras in the area that can be checked?

curlilox I seem to recall there was an incident a little while ago where someone filmed a woman taking wreaths from fresh grave sites. When challenged she admitted she was going to sell them at a local market!!

I have calmed down somewhat now but yesterday I was really angry - especially so for the lady who had the statue stolen from her child's grave. The local authority running the cemetery do remove some dead floral tributes but certainly not the flower holders. Christmas wreaths are usually left for several weeks as being mostly holly they last a long time. I did leave the Christmas wreath for my father but wonder whether it will be there when I go back next week (he died 27th December).

My husband is buried in a different cemetery and as far as I am aware there have never been any similar problems there.