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Micro manager, helpful or control freak?

(18 Posts)
MawBroon Sat 26-Aug-17 11:07:53

Sisters in law are coming up to see DH. ✔️
Hoping to have a bite at a pub near the hospital as they have to bring the dog with them (so pub garden, hope it doesn't rain!!)
They would ring me either when they left Kent or when they joined the M1 to give me an idea of arrival time .
✔️(In theory)
It is 11 o clock, they have just rung from the south end of the Dartford tunnel - well it is a BH weekend.
I think it will take AT LEAST 2 hours from there to here assuming no problems and I have in fact just heard of a dreadful accident in the southbound M1 near us which has closed the motorway.
My point?
Expect trouble on a BH weekend, leave when you say you were going to, not 1 1/2 hours later!
Alternatively I should mind my own business and let them get on with it!! smile

tanith Sat 26-Aug-17 11:13:01

Just don't go near the M25 on bank holiday weekends ?

ninathenana Sat 26-Aug-17 11:14:33

Aagghhh ! Dartford tunnel Saturday lunchtime never mind BH.
If that had been me I'd have done the tunnel 8 am and stopped for breckie the otherside.
I with you on this maw I hope they get there with plenty of time to spend with paw

Jalima1108 Sat 26-Aug-17 11:16:35

Perhaps they'll find another pub on the way for a meal then arrive when they can by a different route - what time is visiting?

How did you do those ticks?

Imperfect27 Sat 26-Aug-17 11:16:55

MawBroon I think I am a bit like you - I tend to see and plan things from more than one angle. I don't think it is 'controlling' of you to have thought through the journey times. DH and I always think about timings and likely traffic loads re holidays / time of day when we travel over distances and we factor them in. We live in Kent and know how bad the Dartford Tunnel can be. We hate being late (think it is a matter of good manners to be on time), but it is evident that a lot of people don't think the same way.

Nothing to be done when there is an accident - - heard about the M1 problems on the radio today, but the Dartford Tunnel is known to be awful.

I hope your visitors are able to avoid the worst of delays and manage to arrive at a decent time for lunch!

MawBroon Sat 26-Aug-17 11:44:25

I get the ✔️✔️✔️ from the menu of emojis on my iPad (2nd button from left, bottom row)
DH's sisters have in the past been "guilty" of LEAVING Tonbridge around the time I have expected them here. (Many a spoiled lunch) Hence my pub suggestion.
I find it hard to "let it go" as waiting for latecomers wastes a large chunk of the day but I am very fond of them and should be used to it by now!
The DDs tend to give them an arrival time of at least an hour in advance for family occasions - christenings, even a wedding!

cornergran Sat 26-Aug-17 11:58:10

I'm with you maw, infuriates me and yes, with some people I use your daughters tactic and give them a time an hour in advance of everyone else. Only got caught out once and put that down to advancing age and failing memory on my part. Got away with it. grin Suggest you take yourself off in good time, find a nice quiet table in the pub garden and relax a bit until they arrive. In all seriousness I hope their journey is uneventful and the road fairy is kind to them - and you - and paw is comfortable today.

Eglantine19 Sat 26-Aug-17 11:59:31

Text them to say take the A1, then the A421. You're Milton Keynes? Satnav will always try to send you up M1 but honestly A1 is so much better. Turn off to Bdford at Sandy roundabout. Don't go to the Black Cat roundabout! I'm a master at this route?

Eglantine19 Sat 26-Aug-17 12:03:06

Who's a control freak now? grin

Fishpieplease Sat 26-Aug-17 12:12:54

Really pleased to have caught this thread. I'm not the only micro manager! I feel it's a promotion from being bossy. Also learnt about the emojis as well.

Seriously ,though, I hope all goes as well as possible this afternoon. It's obviously a stressful time for you,Maw. ?

petra Sat 26-Aug-17 12:17:57

Mawbroon
I feel your pain. We often have this situation with a member of our family.
Only last weekend we were literally walking out the door to meet them when the phone went.
"We are running late"
"How late"
"Don't know, we have to go to etc etc"
Then, I have to contend with OH saying "F**k um, I'm not going.
I'm at the stage now that when there's arrangements I'm going to add another hour.

Primrose65 Sat 26-Aug-17 12:28:06

We are a sad family who use google location sharing for journeys like this, so everyone can see our exact movements (or lack of them) in real time. Technology can really help you micro manage grin

NanaandGrampy Sat 26-Aug-17 12:46:33

As I live near the Dartford tunnel I know the pain it is!! The southbound section is much improved but the northbound not only has a busy incoming slip road almost on the tolls but the tunnel nearest the hardshoulder is the one they close every 10 mins or so to escort the tankers through.

One thing I do know is I would NEVER attempt a crossing day or night on Bank Holiday Friday through to Tues a.m !!

It's madness !!

I think your visitors are going to be there in time for tea . The M1 has been / is still shut around Newport Pagnell! I wouldn't wait for your lunch Maw .

grannyqueenie Sat 26-Aug-17 13:10:14

None of those things maw just a woman with a good dose of common sense! Sadly it's not always there in abundance with other folk grin

Jane10 Sat 26-Aug-17 14:05:27

I hope you've spent the waiting time making up the beds. They'll not get home tonight if they want to spend any time with Paw. Grrrrr. I have a real problem with disorganised people. Luckily DH is the same as me and we're always early!

kittylester Sat 26-Aug-17 17:05:11

We got caught out yesterday going to meet DH's brother and wife. They are always late so we took out time getting to our meeting place and arrived half an hour late, which would normally have still been before them. They'd been there an hour! blush

annsixty Sat 26-Aug-17 17:30:11

On one notable occasion when we were going to have a weeks holiday in Dorset with D and young family we had gone a few days before and stayed in Somerset. On the Saturday I rang to ask what time they would be arriving. We had gone to spend sometime and have lunch in Poole.
I was not happy to be told Sil had just gone into the loft to get the cases down. They remained like this for the length of their marriage.

Norah Sat 26-Aug-17 17:58:31

I usually assume when not planning, person(s) do not care one jot about the visit. I find I am correct 90% the time. smile So, I choose to not care either.