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Jokes for young children

(14 Posts)
Elegran Tue 25-Jul-17 13:45:59

Or first you take the elephants out.

Greyduster Tue 25-Jul-17 13:31:06

How do you get four giraffes in a car?
You can't. It's full Iof elephants!

Wheniwasyourage Mon 24-Jul-17 22:28:31

Did you hear about the magic tractor? It turned into a field.

Did you hear about the hole in the road? The police are looking into it.

How do you get 4 elephants into a car? (used to be a Mini in my young day) 2 in the back and 2 in the front.

What goes up a chimney down but not down a chimney up? An umbrella.

hildajenniJ Mon 24-Jul-17 20:47:52

What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Cliff.

MamaCaz Mon 24-Jul-17 15:04:07

Some of these are perfect. I can't wait till he gets back from his hols so i can use some of them, although I did text one to him this morning (Greyduster's lobster joke grin) via his mum, hoping that she will read it out to him on their journey down to Devon.

Greyduster Mon 24-Jul-17 14:47:52

Might go over his head a bit but -
Where do crabs and lobsters catch the train? Kings Crustaceon.

Ilovecheese Mon 24-Jul-17 12:57:54

How do you start a bears race?

Ready teddy go

hildajenniJ Mon 24-Jul-17 11:49:33

Q. What's brown and sticky
A. A stick.

Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State building?
Of course, the Empire State building can't jump!

Knock knock,
Who's there,
Cows,
Cows who,
No silly, cows moo.

PoshGran Mon 24-Jul-17 11:18:58

What goes "Zzub Zzub"? A bee flying backwards.

What's green & goes up & down? A gooseberry in a lift.

Greyduster Mon 24-Jul-17 09:49:03

My GS was five when he learned - and repeated endlessly - his first joke. "Why did the lobster blush? Because the sea weed!"

"What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested custard!"
"What do witches like best about their computers? The spell checker".
"How do you know when there are two elephants in your fridge? You can hear them talking!"

MamaCaz Mon 24-Jul-17 09:46:19

"Lots available on th Internet".

Doh - why didn't I think of that! blush
I will have to write some of those down so i remember them when needed smile

Mortaff Mon 24-Jul-17 09:29:50

Lots available on the internet:

www.babycenter.com/0_35-silly-jokes-for-kids_10317809.bc
www.childhoodbeckons.com/2012/07/30-jokes-your-kids-will-love.html

If you cannot open these, PM me and I will copy them into a message!

vampirequeen Mon 24-Jul-17 09:28:06

What do you call a sheep with no legs? A cloud.

How do you make a bandstand? Take away their chairs.

What did the big chimney say to the small chimney? You're too young to smoke.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Why did the cow go to a cinema? To see a mooooovie.

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? A woolly jumper.

MamaCaz Mon 24-Jul-17 08:56:25

My DGS, 6, is starting to appreciate jokes, but I am struggling to think of any suitable for that age group.

One I remember from when i was that age is "what's black and white, and re(a)d all over? A newspaper."

More suggestions, please smile