So. . . . .would you be brave enough to end it all? And if so, how?

bikergran I agree about it not being an easy thing to do when the time comes. Definitely about it being frightening. I have an incurable disease and although I've talked on this thread in an 'easy' manner, I know it would be very hard to carry out my plan and I would be very scared. That's part of the problem really. If euthanasia was legal it would take away some of that emotion. We are talking about what would be our 'method of choice', but really it's not much of a choice. I am sorry about what you experienced as a child.

I belong to the pressure group Dignity in Dying. The latest case it is backing in a court case is that of Noel who has MND. I find it utterly appalling that he cannot choose when he wants to end his suffering. What is do paradoxically wrong is that he could live longer if he were able to get help with dying but that because he will have to be able to do it himself, he and others like him die earlier than they need to. Some people have also said in countries where this is allowed that just knowing they could choose to die if it all got too much meant that they got through bad patches and again lived longer.

I am also a member Rigby.

Biker I think it depends on the person who finds the body. Yes, it's not something you would actually 'forget' but while some would be terminally traumatised, others grieve and move on. It depends on the relationship that existed, it depends on the age of the victim, it depends on so much.

Wilma sorry to read about your illness.

I also agree about the shouty voice of the christian church. It is often minority groups like that who are most vocal. I support Dignity in Dying too and have signed the petition.

My husband did it.
He had a living will and was dying of brain cancer. He told the doctor he did not want any more help.
She agreed on the Friday morning. He was diabetic.
No more insulin, food or drink, from then on unless he asked for it. He never did, and died just before midnight on the Sunday.

dj I hope he didn't suffer at the end or at least not too much. How infantilised we are in being able to choose if we want to end our lives because of unbearable suffering and/or because we are terminally ill. My next door neighbours final memory of her husband is his screaming in pain in hospital. His hospice place come through the day after he died. People opposing the aims of Dignity in Dying are very very misleading, to say the least, about the availability of hospice care and the medics ability to always control pain. In addition, even if you are pain free, but locked in eg MND your suffering can be immense. Other countries allow people to choose and the world hasn't ended. My sister had a very moving goodbye conversation with a Swedish friend who was about to legally end her life because of her terminal prognosis and suffering.

Is there dignity in suicide?

Thanks, Rigby.
He didn't suffer any more than he had before that.
He had carers coming in four times a day. He died in his own bed, which is what he wanted, rather than in hospital.
In fact he did not even need morphine for the last day, despite having been in pain for fifteen years before that.
If you ask any of the carers he had, they would have said it was a dignified death.
Apart from the brain tumour he also had cerebellar ataxia, which is a bit like motor neurone disease, where your body gradually gives up, so you end up not being able to swallow properly.
He did not want the indignity of being fed by tube, which was his choice.
Surely the whole point about dignity in dying is that you have choice.

ab as you well know, it all depends. My ndn's husband had no dignity in his death - screaming out in pain 'I want to die, I want to die'

That's so sad DJ. But understandable.
I sometimes remind husband that I'm 8 years older than him and likely to die first, because he refuses to plan for that. I was a bit horrified yesterday when he said he would kill himself by driving off one of the steep hills here. He might do it too, his father tried it twice with pills, and his eldest brother actually did kill himself ( not sure how.)
Also surprised to hear him admit how much he depends on me

I believe there can be dignity is suicide. Why not? Its choosing when the time is right, and hopefully passing away without pain. I've certainly seen a good few natural deaths which haven't afforded the sufferer that choice.

Thanks, Tricia. Even after five and a half years, it still has me questioning if it was right, but we know it was what he wanted, and had asked for, and it was written down.
It hurts those left behind, even when you know it was a rational decision.
The main thing to remember is that right up until the end it is possible to change your mind - but he never did, because he knew how horrible it would have been any other way.

Sorry, but it's not really chat to some.

Yes, I would be brave enough to do it. I'd have to be very sure that whatever I took (I couldn't do it any other way) would kill me and not leave me in a coma or disabled in some way, so serious research would be necessary.

But yes, I have witnessed undignified and agonising deaths. Why this is allowed I have no idea...

I suppose because it could so easily be abused, if it were to become the norm.

MissAdventure we can learn from other countries who allow it and seem to manage it perfectly well.The present system leads to horrible abuse of a different kind.

I'm sure we could, Rigby. Personally, I'm all for it; at least having the option there. Sometimes that may even be enough? To know that it can be bought to a humane end, if it all gets too much.

Exactly Miss thats what some of the research shows and it makes sense doesn't it?

Yep. I think it the feeling of helplessness that must be so difficult. I remember seeing a woman on tv who had M.S and was trying to fight for her right to die.
She said she had finished finding anything remotely funny about her circumstances; she had found some humour in the circumstances that M.S had presented over the years, but it just wasn't funny anymore. How sad..

Is there dignity in suicide AB asked. Yes, and bravery too.

The sucicides I have been close to were not dignified , one was brave, the others from depression and one from grief .

So why weren't the last two dignified, in your view, Annie?

Are you perhaps judging those people by your own standard of ethics?

www.theguardian.com/society/2017/jul/16/terminally-ill-man-challenges-uks-ban-on-assisted-dying-at-high-court

Bluebelle sorry if I misunderstood. You wrote about not having any peace if you thought a family member was so unhappy that they had to plan their own death. If I choose to end my life it will not be because I am unhappy. It will be because I do not wish to continue to the logical conclusion of my condition. (e.g. Descent into dementia where I don't know who, where, or what I am, or the end of a terminal disease where pain and trauma for my loved ones and myself is totally pointless)
If I choose to go then I hope that everyone sees it as a statement of who I am and rejoices that I did it my way.

How would you do it? Most women swallow a drug overdose, men tend to favour hanging, jumping off a height or in front of a train.
I can't think of a more selfish act than subjecting your family or strangers to witnessing your violent death or finding you afterwards. Very few people actually do it with medical guidance in Switzerland or at home.
I think it's braver and more dignified to die naturally.