Is this being unkind or selfish

That's on our list as well Algeswife, thanks. I want to see if I can get some real old fashioned Sunlight soap.

Great to hear you had a lovely time - and I love that you had a private lift home! Perfect!

Thanks for telling us how it went and so glad to hear everything was fine.

Auntie Flo. Try and make time to go to Port Sunlight village. It's amazing.

Algeswife, I'm so glad you enjoyed your holiday after all the kerfuffle beforehand. We are going to Liverpool in October, mainly because I have long wanted to see the Cathedral. The statues on Crosby beach are another 'must see'.

I said I would post how my break to Liverpool fared.
The other three had just arrived at the station when I turned up. I felt rather 'silly' not having had the lift. On speaking to the others apparently her husband is the difficult one. He wasn't prepared to go even the slightest way out of his way to get me. I got my own back on the return journey as I was picked up by a friend and drove off without them, they had to bus home. Liverpool is fantastic, Crosby beach, Southport, such a large city. Would love to go again. The atmosphere amongst us was ok. Thanks for the input everyone. Val

..parting words to *her upon your return....

I can think of a few.

She sounds like a controlling bossy trout, and the other 2 should not have colluded with her and her/her hubbys selfish ideas which she obviously planned without thought to your feelings before telling you.

I would not want to go anywhere with any of them, nor would I have given the 'controller' a lift home.

But as you are going be cautious with all of them, keep your thoughts to yourself, be icy but polite to 'controller' and plan a few parting words to you upon your return. Horrible, nasty behaviour. These aren't true friends.

Something not dissimilar happened to a member of my family. One by one over a period of time the others (the innocent bystanders) saw this person for the old crow she clearly is. Sadly the upset caused by aforementioned old crow to my family member was extensive. After a while, old crow emailed fam mem 'explaining' their behaviour; we all advised not to respond.

Don't let this spoil your holiday. Play the game, if it happens on holiday speak up, be ready for her.

Also, when an opportunity arises during the week (maybe over a glass of wine) say to her in earshot of the others, that you were curious as to why she organised the lifts the way she did, as you had felt hurt by it.

Algeswifeval the Maritime museum in Liverpool is excellent and has a very good cafe if you need to escape from Joan. Ditto the Tate and the Walker Art Gallery and John Lewis. All within walking distance of each other or an underground from railway station to Albert Dock if you need it. Liverpool is amazing, hope you have a great time, the locals will chat to you. Good luck.

The holiday is not going to be as you expected Algeswifeval you cannot brush off the feeling which will only increase as you climb on the bus on Monday morning knowing the others are all laughing excitedly together as they climb into the Range Rover it has divided the group no question about that Whether she is devisive or lacking in thought and tact make no difference it will cast a huge shadow over the break for you I hope you can get something out of the holiday I think I d be very tempted to go off on my own or maybe as it sounds as if you have some sort of connection with Jackie (although she didn't stick up for you) can you split up into two groups for a lot of the time
Good luck I do hope you can enjoy it and look forward to hearing how you managed it all

Go and enjoy your trip and make the most of it. By the end of the weekend, you will know how you stand about this woman and make a decision if you want to continue the "friendship".

Go and enjoy yourself. Just now be aware that This Woman is no friend to you.

I'd be tempted to be a cow too and arrange the next outing minus Joan.

People never cease to amaze me. Could it be that she was tired and tactless, putting it a way that she didn't mean? How long have you known her? Has she form for this type of thoughtlessness? Do the others know? If I was one of the others and knew I would be arranging to be the other one travelling to the station with you as I would want someone to do the same if I was the odd one out. Try to not let it spoil things, make a joke of it if you possibly can.

4 women (so called friends) going to Liverpool Monday to Friday next week. I live in Essex.
Brand new Range Rover, so in the Range Rover, 3 women and the driver ( driver is the husband of Joan) Joan says no room for me, I must bus to the station. What a Cow. I shall go as all paid for, feel I don't want to though. I see Joan in a different light now. She also tried to rearrange our travel schedule which was worked out meticulously by Jackie. I have spoken to Jackie since and we will weather this storm but I'm crossing Joan off my list of Acquaintances. I was so looking forward to it, will keep you posted after its over with how it went.

Please forget it- I'm sure we've all said or done thoughtless things that have upset others- have a great break.

from the sketchy info I'm wondering if she's assessed you as the most fit/capable person to get public transport. But I agree sounds mean

Don't spend a holiday with this woman-however short. If I were you I would make some sort of excuse and not go. She sounds thoroughly nasty and could be difficult to spend time away with. What a horrible thing to say to you. The car is plenty large enough for all of you, and well she should know it.
Seriously, this does not bode well for a holiday away with her. If I were one of your other two friends I would, in reaction to this woman's blatant nastiness, have said" don't worry , we'll all go together on the bus/ in a taxi" Have you expressed your feelings about her remark with your other friends?

Aww that's not a nice thing to do! I remember many years ago I had something similar done to me - no room in the car for you, but room for everyone else.

If you really want to spend your time with people like that I wish you well, but whether you can dismiss your resentment is another thing.

It kind of sets the tone, for you anyway.

I really do empathise, but the question needs to be asked why YOU were selected. There may be a reason in her head and she doesn't think to let you in on it. Try to reserve judgement until you know.

All the best xx

Surely with a group of people close enough to go away together, the obvious way would be for her to say " My husband is giving me a lift to the station. Unfortunately all of us cant fit in the car so we could take 2 more but one person will need to get there another way. Any ideas on bed way to do this?"
I think your friends do not come out well in this; be wary!

Thanks Kim for your kind words

just following this thread and can empathize with the poster and other who have had similar.... will watch with interest to see how this so called friendship develops (or not)

If you were the last to arrive (with seating limitations), that is probably why you were left out. It that's the case, it likely was not personal. From your description, this woman has very poor social skills at best and at worst she's callously insensitive.

I would prefer my own taxi anyway (people can make you late etc.). Don't let this 'one thing' sour your holiday. You can still make the best of it and have a great time. If this is someone you know casually, give her a chance to redeem herself. If she continues to live up to her rudeness, you'll be glad for that taxi (upon your return), secure in the knowledge that going forward, you can choose other cohesive friends to go on break with.

I think she's thoughtless and unkind,how about booking a taxi for all of you and sharing the cost?
Make sure they have to come to your house to get it ( her husband can bring them)