feeling guilty

[jimmyRFU] I know exactly how you feel when you say you feel the day is wasted when you see the lovely sunny day.

Not really fair your DH telling you not to go to work I think if you want to go to work then you should

My DH husband also like to have our lives fairly separate, with him doing his own thing and me doing mine, which I don't like and am not happy about but have definitely embraced it.

He wasn't always like that but at some point he just went back to acting like a single man.

An alternative, and this would make you feel that you were doing something worth while perhaps is volunteering.

Your day sounds perfect Maggie and what I shall do when I retire !

[Travelsafar] NO definitely not, why would you feel guilty for rest now after all the years that you have worked.

I think maybe this feeling of guilt you have when you rest, must have been installed in you from childhood

ENJOY the WELL EARNED REST and chuck guilt out the window

offended,sorry

A friend gave me a fridge magnet that said" you can look at the dust but don't write in it",she knew I would'nt be offened, she was right too. Housework? WHY? It won't go anywhere.

I love being retired (13 year's now).Do what I want ,when I want,and if I don't feel like doing it I don't.Brillant life,I certainly don't feel guilty,I've nobody to please but my self.

I never feel guilty about this as I feel that I'll catch up later if necessary. Early this morning I did the ironing and yes, I'm lazy so I'll spend much of the rest of the day doing as I jolly well please.
I admit that I'm a lazy article in the housekeeping department but you don't get medals for dusting.
I've an embroidered cushion which reads 'housework won't kill you buy why take the risk?'

No I don't feel guilty. I often watch television all day and evening. I do however get bored stiff. I've got plenty of time to be doing lots of stuff in the house such as housework, washing curtains /windows etc. but I just don't want to do it! . I think that's partially depression. I got made redundant a year ago and I would like to find a job for two days a week. I only have my state pension and no private pension. I do have some money left by my mother, but I don't want to keep eating into it because I might need it when I'm older, although I have been gradually using it. I think the job would keep me fit and save me having to keep dipping into that money. I do yoga Friday mornings and hula fit Wednesday nights and I go out for lunch a couple of days a week.

NO. Do what you want to do, and if that means nothing carry on and enjoy yourself. xx

I was made redundant April 2013 after 35 plus years with the same organisation. Through that time I got married, had children and worked full time except for maternity leave. My parents were our child minders.

When I lost my job it took me a long time to get used to not getting up at 5.30 to walk the dog and get my lift. Then home after to do the chores. Had to get myself into the retired frame of mind.

Here I am 2017 and I feel ike I'm wasting my life some days. I've kept my hand in a bit at Microsoft Office so could get a little job but hubby says no, stay home. I'm not bothered about getting a job but want to get out and visit places, see things. I can find plenty to do - walk the dog, housework, etc but some days its not enough.

I think the problem is hubby has an evening job and his day consists of hanging aroound the house and having breakfast until 10 am. Then going out and being back by 2 pm to watch tv before going to work.

On a lovely day like today its infuriating that so much lovely weather is being wasted. I've told him to ether get his act together or I will go out on my own.

I meant 'read' - perhaps a typing course could be fitted into my idle times?

I had very little time to myself during the 'children' years, and after, due to a ghastly financial crisis. Since retiring I have gradually come to revel in the complete freedom and can now relax and red a book, catch up on some TV or mess around on the PC without feeling that I should be ironing, dusting, attending a U3A lecture or improving my mind and body in some way. i do understand how you feel, travelsafar, but if you work at it you will gradually find you can tootle about pleasing yourself for most of the time - the great joy of retirement.

Yes of course it is fine to do this, provided we keep our minds alive and bodies relatively active for the rest of the time. As a matter of fact I sit down every afternoon with tea, a rug and a book. I get up at 6am and fit in all my activities/housework etc up until 2pm..ish and sit down about 3pm..ish. It replenishes me enabling me to start again about 5pm or 6pm!

I do still feel guilty when doing nothing, I retired 2 months ago. But then I tell myself not to be stupid as I deserve to have a rest

No never, Jenny. I have been a kept woman all my married life - daytime is for "working", evenings are for enjoying oneself! Although we are both retired, I still feel guilty. I carry on watching, but I feel guilty.
I also always knit or crochet as if I didn't, I would be the size of the proverbial brick sh.t-house...

If 'born into money' we would probably not have ever thought twice about it - but yes even after several years I still get guilt pangs which I try to convince myself are a working class weakness.

You will get over the guilt. I used to be exactly the same but now, I rush around doing all my chores so that I can sit and do nothing but read and watch to. I do go to keep fit twice a week I might add.

Travelsafar Not any more do I feel guilty in doing that which I enjoy and entitled to do.
Through out my youth and then married life it was shouldn't you be doing this and not that?.Even if it had no consequences to those making that comment.
Now although I miss those who would make me feel this 'guilt' the freedom in doing it when and if I want to is something I cherish. All the way

Never. I like to get all my jobs done in the morning so that the afternoon is mine to do what I please.DH has tv on most of the day, especially now with the cricket. I don't watch a lot of daytime tv but do like the quiz programmes (I'm exercising my brain). Otherwise I can be found sitting in the other room or the garden doing crosswords etc, reading or knitting/crochet. I find it difficult to sit and not do anything I almost always knit or crochet while watching TV.

Always felt guilty after retiring and used to think I had to 'justify my existence' by recounting to DH every little thing I'd done during the day - very exciting for him! Thought it would change once he also retired but still have those feelings of guilt although not as strong.

Constantly, especially watching TV during the day. Don't watch sports of any sort. I record edifying programmes to justify my viewing!

My dad could never sit still. His mantra was "there's enough time for sleeping when you're dead" ! As a consequence I still find it difficult doing nothing and often find myself justifying lack of activity to OH - who couldn't give a damn!

I have have always volunteered but just finished that .

I have been retired for 3 months and I am bored already. I have tried joining everything but somehow I don't want to just talk. I miss the challenges and achievements. I do crafts but always have. I belong to groups such as Meetup. I have friends and family. I find just doing things for myself after doing stuff for others all my life feels I now have no purpose

No, definitely not. I just agree with the saying 'time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time'. Just enjoy it.