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AIBU re MCR collection?

(119 Posts)
Jane10 Fri 02-Jun-17 12:17:37

Just back from shopping. A nice lady was doing bag packing 'for Manchester'. I asked what this collection was for and all she could say was that it was to 'help' Manchester. I was puzzled. I understand the impulse to do something supportive but am not sure how just sending money would help.
Sadly there are many victims of terrorism, many of them are languishing in refugee camps. Would money collected not be better directed towards them? Obviously I'll be told I'm a miserable cow for thinking this but I do!

Jane10 Sat 03-Jun-17 20:01:17

I resent being called hard and tight fisted. I am happier giving to those also cruelly affected by these terrorist atrocities and who have far far less help and support than those affected in Manchester. I am also wary of the rapacious bandwagon jumpers who take advantage of such awful situations as this. Its hard to believe that people can stoop so low.

Carobel Sat 03-Jun-17 19:56:08

If you wish to give to the fund raising contact the Manchester Evening News. Do remember that not only have 22 people died but there are people injured who will have to cope with the trauma of their injuries for years to come. I know people still coping with the effects of the IRA bomb from 21 years ago

Nanna58 Sat 03-Jun-17 19:48:28

I'm with Vonnie1 and Paddyann, in that I believe the money that I and others gave will help those affected- lord, some of you are a hard hearted and tight fisted lot!

acanthus Sat 03-Jun-17 18:39:05

I agree with Jane10 and similar sentiments expressed. £7 million is quite enough - who is going to manage such a fund too? I can see a lot of ill-feeling being generated when the time comes to apportion it out, and, dare I say, some unscrupulous people coming forward with spurious claims. I am always perplexed by how quickly huge sums of money to various causes are collected online and yet people are so ready to be cruel and intolerant both online and in public. And I don't think these two strands of society are necessarily separate.

Carobel Sat 03-Jun-17 17:56:34

I have to concur with the sentiments expressed here. As a proud Mancunian, i'm very grateful that so many people have opened their hearts to the City and the victims. However when giving money you should be wary of people collecting who cannot tell you which charity they're collecting for and produce proof of that.
Besides which the fund is now raised over £7 million and it may be time to look beyond Manchester and contribute to funds in other places where people are being affected by this murderous death cult.

W11girl Sat 03-Jun-17 17:45:11

I'm with you Jane10 and others. Not enammoured by the forthcoming concert, its unnecessary in the scheme of things. Someone's making money out of it..not those affected or bereaved I bet.

willa45 Sat 03-Jun-17 17:37:19

Sorry..You guys must think I'm already going soft, but it's just that I don't read carefully enough.....I initially thought she was bagging the donations (instead of groceries).

Funny... I know!

willa45 Sat 03-Jun-17 17:29:32

Sadly, when a tragedy like this occurs there is no shortage of opportunists and con artists.

You mentioned "bag packing"... and that you weren't sure how just sending money would help. Most charities won't collect more than one specific type of donation (it's either money or food or clothes etc,) never more than one type. Was she collecting money and other things as well? They should also have their credentials on display.

In any case, people who feel a strong empathy towards the victims are the ones most likely to volunteer because they don't want to feel so helpless. They are particularly motivated to talk about where donations are going and how they will be used.

Someone with such a vague, unqualified reply doesn't fit that profile, so don't be so hard on yourself. You were probably very smart not to give that 'nice' lady anything.

Granny23 Sat 03-Jun-17 14:46:17

Here in Central Scotland (probably elsewhere too?) I know that neither my Independent Celebrant DD nor the funeral directors she works for charge anything for their services at Child funerals.

I agree with CC that as the victims came from all over (e.g. one dead, one with life changing injuries from the Isle of Barra), most of the funds raised should go to a relevant National Charity with, perhaps a memorial park or garden in Manchester.

Madgran77 Sat 03-Jun-17 14:11:37

My thoughts exactly!

babyjayne Sat 03-Jun-17 13:33:10

I too have been wondering where the money is going. As it is growing to such a high amount I hope the Red Cross will come up with a plan and let us know basically what is going to happen. I don't think at this time we need a blow by blow account of who's having what or at anytime really.

I would hate to think that the money would be supervised (if that's the word) and they have to ask for every penny. Or in 20, 30, 40 years time they are living in poverty.

It will probably be a nightmare for the trustees to sort everything out so that everyone gets a fair share.

handmadedogsweaters Sat 03-Jun-17 12:22:22

I 100% agree with VONNIE1 sensible lady.

Av1dreader Sat 03-Jun-17 12:14:06

I watched the documentary about Aberfan a few months ago. One lady whose daughter died bought a caravan, something they would never have been able to afford. The weekend trips and holidays the family were able to take helped the family enjoy life a bit again.

IngeJones Sat 03-Jun-17 12:07:04

Oh it's like the McCann fund. I donated to help the cost of finding the little girl then it seemed like they were spending loads of it on suing some policeman for slandering them. While I understand their indignation that wasn't what the fund was meant for, I thought?

BLUEBIRDHLO Sat 03-Jun-17 12:03:38

Sadly many of the victims are badly injured and will need help for their long term care. Hopefully also funds will go to a lasting memoriam such as a park or even garden in the centre of Manchester. And perhaps some longer term community developments to support integration and prevent future attacks. Whatever is decided, the funds will need trustees who can provide appropriate careful long term management.

Helmsley444 Sat 03-Jun-17 11:52:27

I may be wring but in the case of young children 8 years and 16 etc as were some of the poor victims .Parents usually dont have there childs life insurance in place .I no we never when my 2"boys were young.Then the last thing they need to be worrying abt is the funerals.Si the money shd go to all the victims wonded and killed.And for counsilling .

cc Sat 03-Jun-17 11:48:52

I absolutely hate having my bags packed at the supermarket!
I'd be very wary of giving money to anyone claiming to be collecting "for Manchester" other than an official charity, there are already plenty of fraudsters out there.
I agree with previous posters, some families will need financial help but some will wonder how money can help with their loss.
The idea of a park for children is great in principle, but the people involved came from all over the UK so it could not work in practice.
Surely better to give it to an existing charity that helps with rehab in case of life changing injuries, be it loss of limbs, of hearing or of sight. And victims' mental health is bound to suffer of course. You can specify that your donation is to be used for children I believe, though many victims and their families are obviously older.

hicaz46 Sat 03-Jun-17 11:40:20

you only have to see that 10,000 people lied to try to get tickets for the concert to know that their are people out there who exploit any situation even tragic ones. So I too would be wary of giving money without knowing what it was for,

quizqueen Sat 03-Jun-17 11:38:02

Personally, I wouldn't let anyone pack my bags in a supermarket but I can't understand why some people here are saying money won't help those affected in Manchester. Families may have lost a wage earner and so the surviving parent (if there was one) will need to pay for childcare as well as cover the lost salary. Families could be visiting children in hospital for months with all the costs that entails- time off work/petrol/parking. Then there's associated costs afterwards, maybe conversions to their homes to accommodate wheelchairs etc. Someone suggested a park; that's not going to help them nor is giving to other causes abroad.

I would never give a penny to Foreign Aid charities. The government already gives £25,000,000 A DAY of taxpayers' money to that cause. Actually, that's incorrect, it borrows the money to allow it to do that!

BlueBelle Sat 03-Jun-17 11:20:27

Bionicsoman I understand your post I often think about how one life ' appears' so much more valuable than another and why ? I truely feel for those poor kids in Manchester the families it's unimmaginable but the little kids in Syria are living it daily it's not an argument for or against just saying in my head all victims everywhere should have a similar level of sorrow and care and empathy
I'm guessing when something hits an unexpected place and there are mass injuries and deaths it appears more of a tragedy and it's everyone's sticking plaster to make themselves feel better to buy flowers or give money

libra10 Sat 03-Jun-17 10:44:08

Two of the young children who were killed were local to us, and most of the homes in our village are displaying pink and yellow ribbons in support of their families.

Such a tragedy to happen, and everyone (including Ariana Grande, along with other stars) are giving their time to do a concert in Manchester this weekend to show support.

Although money raised can never replace loved ones, it might help to ease the families' way through the minefield of emotions and problems that they must be going though now and in the future.

Jalima1108 Sat 03-Jun-17 10:37:36

I agree with your post ninathenana

Unfortunately there are always unscrupulous people who will take advantage of even such a tragic event as this to make - steal - money.

OurKid1 Sat 03-Jun-17 10:36:28

Definitely not just you. I've often thought the same when people claim compensation for the death of a child in other circumstances. I used to work for a Solicitor and said the same to him. I was told that "it could help pay for a holiday to help them forget." FORGET??!! I don't think so. The only circumstances I can think of when it's justified is if extra expense is incurred, through, for instance the loss of a breadwinner, visits to hospital (including parking) and such.

Diddy1 Sat 03-Jun-17 10:35:59

If the money helps families with funerals, and the injured get help for the future, then that is ecceptable,I like to know where the money is going.
Also about the flowers, tributes etc, sometimes it seems "over the top" in Stockholm where there were people killed/injured a few weeks ago, there were flowers laid for weeks, in fact they have just been removed, the money instead of flowers, could have been used in another way, being honest the florists dont do so badly! I wonder what the comments will be now!

Kim19 Sat 03-Jun-17 10:27:12

Vonnie1, I fully understand that IMMEDIATE money is a help (necessity even) for those caught up in tragedies like Manchester. However....... what often happens with donations is that they go into a common fund and lie there until official/formal decisions are made as to how and when disbursement is established. This often involves lawyers and slow slow procedures. That's why I wondered, in an earlier post, if anyone had knowledge of any 'instant' government aid. I do believe there could be many ancient disaster funds still in exsistence and being 'managed' whilst those originally involved could make use of the cash and wind up the account.