Will I ever be really happy again

I really feel for you- I lost a good friend when she had a breakdown & refused to see any of her old friends & moved away. I was very hurt that she could not trust me enough to let me help her.
I would seriously suggest joining a club with all women to give you some company & broaden your circle of friends. Maybe a reading group or craft group. I joined a W.I. ( which has both of these & so much more)& never looked back. You need to find an evening one with younger members but there are loads of them out there.
Only problem is my DH complains I am never in!

You must be very hurt by this however try not to let it stop you finding friends again but I will say I have work colleagues who are friends but I don't let them into my life like I do close friends out of work I also feel it's more difficult to make new friends now I am older

How horrible for you. I had the same at work and how I coped I will never know. It is hard to trust again and there is no advice I can offer on that, sometime you will find that another friendship just creeps up on you. I hope it does.

My view was works work but home is home and neither the twaine shall mix. I've worked for over 40 years & it's stood me in good stead

Hi I haven't had a close friend in years especially a woman just don't seem to make them I have friends yes but not close and I think that is hard to find not really happy in my marriage either but I guess that's life somethings you can't change you just keep searching

RuthieK, I had a similar experience last year although not work related. I think she had a fit of paranoia and just flipped in all honesty. She had been having treatment for a psychiatric disorder. On the surface, she was wonderful but she took something I'd said the wrong way and really went all out to destroy my credibility. The lies were the worst. She also went to other friends and 'got in first' with a highly exaggerated story. As I said, the lies were the worst. In essence, she couldn't do me much damage but like you, I felt bereft because I really valued her as a friend.

But you do learn and looking back, I think I had a lucky escape. It's better to have friends outside of work and you need to choose carefully. I have one good friend that I've known for 25 years. I rarely see her but when I do, it's as though we see each other all the time. I have lots of other friends but I am careful with how much I say.
You will get over your lost friend, time is good healer, it's true. Strike out in a new direction, start being independent and if you're like me, and have a good husband, make him your new best friend.
Get a dog and a cat too. They never let you down.

Chin up! Don't dwell on what's gone. Map out a new race track and get on it. xxxx

I went through almost exactly the same thing, a girl I worked with and whom I thought of as a great friend betrayed me when she wanted the promotion and thought I was more likely to get it (I didn't even want it) she bullied me and showed me in a bad light with the bosses whenever she had the opportunity. She hurt me badly and I ended up with a nervous breakdown and it took me years to recover. I came out stronger, and, eventually I moved on. It was terribly hard, and no, I don't have friends as close any more. But i have learned that I have my family for that tremendous bond. I have good girlfriends but my core hopes and joys are shared with my husband and my close family. Life is good, and although it took me a long time, I believe I came out wiser and the end of it. Hugs to you, it will get better. Make new friends through WI or clubs and look to the future, that would be my advice

I am sorry to hear what you have been through Ruthiek. To facde such disloyalty after all those years from someone whom you thought you could rely on is like a smack in the face. You have done the right thing I think, but try now not to let it ruin the rest of your life. I think it may be the " friend" who will regret this over time.
You have another Job, Great Husband and Family, this is your foundation, build on it, don't shut other potential friends out for fear of a similar thing happening. The best may be yet to come. I hope so.

So very sorry for what has happened to you Ruthiek. They are not worth a second thought and new friends will come along. Maybe you will hold back in some ways now but a lot of us do that after being so badly hurt and let down. Look forward, plan some fun things and trust in yourself and those who love you.

You've not only been betrayed, you're also suffering from the bereavement of loosing your friends. No wonder you feel depressed, but as you say you have a wonderful DH and family who you can trust to help you move on. Be kind to yourself, although you may not be as trusting, you will have fun again and will make new friends.

It's the feeling of betrayal that hurts the most isn't it? And that's very hard to get over, but you will, in time. Move on, make new friends and learn from this. Be friendly, but don't invest too much in people; keep a bit of yourself back. And for what it's worth; if your 2 friends were as close to you as you were to them, they have almost certainly reflected back on the events that happened and will also be feeling regretful.

Oh you poor poor woman
I think you handled it in the best way anyone could.
I hesitate to tell you that it would not happen again. I presume nothing like that has happened to you before?

I understand you missing your closest friend. I am not sure it is her you miss, as she turned out not to be who you thought she was. But the friendship?

I think you just have to move on, ruthiek,

You will probably never feel the same sort of 'happiness' you dtd when everything was going right, but take it on the chin and get on with the rest of your life!

Ruthiek It's a horrible feeling isn't it when someone you were close to let's you down.
Without going into long boring details, I have learned that its not a good idea to get too close to people that you work with.
I can understand how you feel though. Female friends are important to me.
Now that I have retired, although I do keep in touch with a few work colleagues I am looking to join in with local things and looking to connect with people that way.

That's hard for you ruthiek but we live and learn don't we?Usually the hard way.
If you make new friends through clubs, WI etc they are unlikely to be bullying in the same way that workforce bullies/cliques work.I have made friends this way and had no problems.Good luck.?