How do you remember things... ? Is this a daft solution ?

I remember DH saying years ago 'don't ever let me become a man of riutine like my uncle' but having a certain routine does help eg changing bed linen on a Monday, shopping on a Friday unless something more exciting turns up.

My problem is the opposite to angelab; most of my friends are so busy updating me on their lives that thye don't ask me about mine. I've got used to it, and also since I am very private, it obviates the interrogation about my own life.
I used to get rather annoyed and hurt, but now it is a cause of laughter - DH asks me "how much time I'd been allocated! and if it is more than 5 minutes on the hour or more my friend/s and I have spent together, we get points.
If I have forgotten, I just look apologetic and make them feel better!

Before I retired I was a manger in a large organisation. I have found that since I retired I have to work twice as hard at organising my own life. This is partly because all the people I get to know or in some cases to reconnect with come from many different walks of life. For new emails when I put them into the electronic address book in the display name I put the year, the organisation, and then their name i.e. 2017 U3A Jane Doe. This means that I find it much easier to track down people I have met on holiday or at a U3A class etc. Then I do keep a folder for friends and acquaintances on my computer and put in details on a 'running sheet'per peerson that I feel I should remember. And yes I have a card file for my voluntary work.

I also have an excel sheet for all my addresses linked to a labels printing set up. I print it out once a year and then to all those people I do not send a christmas card to, I can look at the remaining address labels and think about what contact I wish to make.

I set up my paper diary each year with A- Z pages for addresses in the back so that any that I use that are new go in there as well as the standard hair, GP, garage etc.

Yesterday in family history class I met someone new who also attended the funeral of a friend. She wrote her name directly into my little address book which I carry in my handbag with my diary. Today I will email her to make sure it works. Ihave warned her it will come as 2017LALher name.

my mother and father keep a birthday calendar and two address books copying one into the other and crossing out with a date anytime someone died. This helped us to invite everyone to her 100th birthday though sadly one important couple got overlooked.

Great to see all the systems we have up an running. this is a useful thread.

Don't feel it's particularly important to remember the minutiae of friends activities. A simple 'where were you again?' does the trick for me if they hadn't already brought it up in the conversation which is often the case. However......I certainly do make a special effort to remember the names of their close family members. These are personal and long standing important details. Where they don't come naturally I do a refresher. Good few friends all with pretty active lives makes it impossible for me to remember specifics. I know my limitations and.....they are many!

I certainly don't worry about when and where my friends go on holiday but I always write on the calendar if somebody close is going into hospital or for tests so I can wish them good luck or call and ask how things went.

I am a multi tasker. I believe my working life in management is responsible
Now retired one would think I have all the time in the world.
Old habits are difficult to get rid of.
I now decorate my kitchen with colourful post it which amuse my friends but at least they can be sure I will be in when they turn up for our usual coffee mornings and I have not wizzed off on something I had forgotten to tell them about.

If you remember that a friend went away but not where then just ask if they enjoyed their holiday and they will respond with 'yes, Crete/France/Lanzarote or wherever was wonderful!

For Birthdays we go by each month and put all the cards on the wall unit ready to post at the appropriate time. We also write the date on the back so we don't forget.

For people's names it is easy if you think of some characteristic such as 'Smiling Sandra', 'Funny Fred', 'Happy Henry'. and add it to their name.

Groceries we usually take a list, but add to it in the shop :-)

We both have a diary to put important things in as well such as dentist or doctor appointments. OH also does a spread sheet with the names, birthdates, age, tel no, email address and home address on them which is in use all the time.

At Christmas I make a list of what I got for whom and keep it for next year so I do not get the same thing twice.

Getting around we use a satnav.

Also if you are computer literate you can set the reminder on your computer to flash up on important dates.

So far so good! When we forget where we keep the computer then we are in trouble!

I have a huge A4 diary which list everything from mulching in the garden on certain month,remembering to text/call friends if been ill, or if even haven't but I realise I maybe hadn't heard from them in a while, appointments, blocking out a day if I need to do something specific, coffee with friends, when to check online banking, keeping adrift of any online shopping I may have done and then returned the shop but need to check when/if the amount gone back into bank account. That sort of thing.
I then transfer every Sunday evening or Monday morning the whole weeks "stuff to do" to a weekely planner tear off pad and write all down on the days of the weeks what I'm doing. I get great satisfaction each day ticking off what Iv done for the day . If by end of week there's "stuff" I didn't do it get transferred over to the following weeks weekly planner!
This works for me .
My friends say I'm too **organised but it's how I am .

We r all different ?

Have to say that looks quite organized, but it is funny standing in the supermarket listening to OH talking to some friendly person and knowing that he has not got a clue who he is talking to. He gives little hints such as 'Is your daughter still in .......?' So I know he is waiting for the person to say something like 'Yes, Clair is still in ......' She has just had a baby you know, Freddy is 3 weeks old now(another for the spreadsheet!). Have to smile to myself because I know he is picking up clues and then when we leave he says 'Nice to see you again Jane!' so I know the penny has dropped and he knows who she is.

Glamdram good idea. We also have a wall calendar for things such as 'man coming to fix the boiler' or 'pay window cleaner' or 'Green thumb coming and needs paying'.

Things can only get worse, but if you do this kind of thing it saves a lot of worry and fretting. Not to mention hurt feelings because you accidentally forgot someone's Birthday.

Perhaps we should make a list of all the lists we use for what and where we keep them! :-)

Life's too short and the brain is too busy to remember trivia. My friends don't remember what I or they have been doing and believe it or not IT DOESNT MATTER. !!!!!!!!!

Month-to-view diary open on table and Post-its around the edge of the table in date order for that month, each secured by a tiny blob of Blu-tac.
When I was working people always used to ask me to remind them of things, and I didn't even have to write them down. Everything has to have my 'belt and braces' method now!

I rely on my phone apps for birthdays, to do lists and a diary too of course. It's all in there, compact and easily accessed

I've got a birthday book - but i forget to look at it!

Ask your best friend how she does it. I often forget things I wanted to say to someone/thank them for/ ask them about . . . so I make notes in my diary.

the thing i struggle with is remberig what i have read. I love books and always have i go to the local library several times a month. But i have started to find that when i pick up a book i have been reading i cant for the life of me remember what it is about or what has happend. So i have to go back a few pages to refresh my memory. I find this strange as i can follow a TV serial which is only shown weekly and remember what has happend but not the book i read the day before. Is it different parts of the brain that deal with viewing and reading do you think??

we all get forgetful as we age, I rely on my calendar and diary to remember important things. Not worth worrying about whats the name of so and so,you would remember their name if they were important to you.

I'm the same travelsafar , I don't do too bad remembering birthday s oh is hopeless apart from immediate family I. Am amazed at lists made but some good ideas on here both my son and daughter make shopping lists I never have !!

A friend (highly intelligent) once told me that at our ages we've seen so much done so much its no wonder we have to filter our thoughts and memories....if we kept it all at our fingertips as it were we'd all go mad. Nothing wrong or daft about limiting what we need to think about from moment to moment....and keeping a diary is just good sense....its not daft. Making lists also seems a perfectly sensible idea....though I've left so many on the kitchen table!
I do get a bit annoyed with myself when its almost as if one bit of my brain refuses to make connections.....e.g I knew I was going away next week yet only this morning I remembered I needed to cancel a regular appointment because ......I was going to be away!!!
That being said I have recently found out that when I really put my mind to it I could sit down and learn, by heart something very particular. It took a little effort and did not go in as easily as it would have 30 odd years ago....but it went in and I was able to recall it as I needed it. The function of memory is quite complex....long term, short term etc but if you understand a little of the basics of how it works it does help.

I am like Anniebach, I just muddle along and I am happy to do it this way.

I belong to one of those e card companies that send me reminders of people's birthdays. At least everyone gets an e card as before I never remembered anyone's birthday.

If it's on the calendar they get a card - if I forget to do it before I've thrown last year's away (which I nearly did this year!) I'd be in trouble...

Do whatever works for you! It's lovely that you care enough to want to remember things - we're all in the same boat so if we all note things down we'll make our friends happy by remembering what's important to them.