In praise of friends

whitewave you have written so beautifully about what your dear friend means to you. Please consider sharing this with her family - it will mean so much.

Nick Robinson was in a position not unlike yours whitewave when he visited friend Steve Hewlett a few days before his death. As well as being BBC colleagues they had the shared experience of Robinson's cancer and he wrote this early one morning shortly afterwards.

"‘One last conversation
So much to say.
So little actually said.
But the pills, the piles of sympathetic letters, the constant flow of visitors said it all
We chat, we gossip, we exchange insights about our shared world.
I’m too British, too male, too stiff upper-lipped to really talk about the fact that it’s a world you and I both know you’ll soon be leaving
To talk about the fact that your “battle” is almost at an end
You “fought” they said.
You’ve been so “brave” they said
Yet you know, I know, anyone who has faced it knows differently
Cancer is not a battle.
There is no choice whether to fight let alone whether to win or lose.
No amount of courage no measure of cowardice can decide the outcome.
There is no virtue in survival. Certainly no lack of it in death.
I lived.
You now know that you will not.
Luck. Chance. Fate. Nothing more. Nothing less.
You didn’t …couldn’t choose
You didn’t …couldn’t decide.
Save, that is, for one thing.
You chose to confront your sickness, your pain, your fear in public
Your decision made thousands realise they were not alone
That really was brave. That a choice that let others know that their sickness, their pain and their fear was not, in fact, just theirs
That one last conversation which was so very worthwhile having.
As I leave you gripped my arm. An unspoken goodbye.
Only now do I know what I should have said.
No one who heard you talk about what you’ve faced will ever forget
Oh yes and one more thing.
Thank you.’ "

Thinking of you ww and all in similar circumstances

Read more: metro.co.uk/2017/02/20/read-bbcs-nick-robinson-heartbreaking-tribute-to-radio-4-presenter-steve-hewlett-6461893/#ixzz4Zgu5mwlf

My sympathy, Whitewave. Your thoughts on friendship are wonderful and so true. Having lost some dear friends myself I know how you feel.

I am so sorry whitewave. True friends are worth their weight in gold

Sorry to hear about your friend.
Those are lovely comments on friendship, I have a couple of good friends that I don't see often but would really miss them in my life.

That must have been so hard whitewave. I'm sad for you.
A lot is written on GN about family ties and so on, but real friendship means just as much and often more.