Are you an only child?

Another 'only' here. Certainly not spoiled but often accused of it by unthinking relatives, mainly one uncle. You do learn to think for yourself as every decision and arrangement as regards parents fall on you. No one else would get involved or be interested. You do feel on your own.

I too am a only child of a only child (my mother)
I'm like bluebell123...find it difficult to ask for help and have been slightly jealous of those who had siblings (rose tinted glasses)....I enjoy my own company but love being with others. Can share my things & time and being an only child has helped me to become the person I am as I had no one else to stand up for me..
I married the younger brother of 2 sons and have 2 children who are 7 years apart so in a way they are only children too

I'm an only child and I replaced a sister who died at about the age of 14 months. I was born 10 months after her passing. I never felt I was quite the right child so my upbringing wasn't easy.

I really missed having a brother or sister when my mum had a dementia and I envied sisters sitting around their mother's bedside. When my husband passed away I also missed not having any brothers or sisters and dh didn't have any either. A close relative of the same age would have been wonderful at this sad time.

I have three grown up sons and 3 grandchildren and they are a huge comfort. Without them I would have ended up alone in the world.

I agree with Christinefrance only children have to be self reliant because they have no sibling support.

An interesting topic. I was an only, daughter of an only who was adopted, mother of an only who is also adopted. We all share similarities (independence, a certain reserve) and it is interesting to see DD with her 2, the sibling rivalries, the stupid arguments (the grandchildren are 7 and 3). I was jealoius of my friends who had siblings but I now know there is no guarantee you will be friends with - or even have contact with - adult siblings. My Dh never sees his brother or sister and they live nearby. He sometimes tries to see his brother, saying he fears their next contact will be at a funeral...

Errrr, I am one of nine children! How i remember envying my friends who were the only child, their parents seemed to dote on them and treat them like the precious treasures all children are, whereas my dear Mum never had the time to stop for a cuddle, too many nappies to wash and mouths to feed! I am, however, very self reliant and independent, love the peace and quiet of my own company too, altho i also love meeting up with friends and family for a good old chin wag!

The only regret of my 69 years is that I am an only child. When I was young I desperately wanted a brother or sister. Luckily for me, my DH has 3 sisters so my children have aunts, uncles and cousins. When DH & I were courting we lived a distance apart so we spent one weekend at his house and one weekend at mine. I always looked forward to my weekend at my DH's house with his parents and sisters and the eldest one was often there with her DH and baby son. I loved the noise and, what to me, was great fun. He, on the other hand, loved the peace and quiet at my house with just DM and me. Now I am older I struggled with having the sole responsibility of making decisions about my DM with dementia, which always left me feeling guilty, though people have said I was lucky as they were constantly battling with siblings whilst making any decisions. I suppose, having said all that, the grass is always greener. I have been blessed with 2 children, a lovely DDiL and 3 amazing grandchildren to whom I am very close.

i'm the eldest of three - younger sister and younger brother.
my sister was "daddy's girl" and my brother was "mummy's boy" so i was rather left out!
i had a good childhood - post-war in the 50s and none of us were spoiled.
i hated feeling the odd one out when i was a child and so i was determined, when i had children of my own, that i wouldn't have an odd number and stopped at two - a girl and a boy.

I'm the middle one of three. I'm perfectly happy with my own company. I'm not sure what middle children are supposed to suffer from or resent except that (as I saw it) my younger sister got new clothes and I got my older sister's cast offs until I learned to make my own clothes.

DH is an only child and hated it He was adamant that if we had one child we would have at least two !

Both DH and I were only children, and I was always desperate for an elder brother (it took me a long time to realise that it wasn't going to happen). In my mid teens I disovered that I did, in fact, have half-siblings and never forgave my father for not telling me. However, I adopted my best friend's family as an extension of my own. Both DH and I are loners by nature, and just don't need anyone apart from immediate family, but I don't know if that's as a result of having been onlies? Possibly

I m an only child if an only child ( my mum) dad was the youngest by 10 years of five
I hated being an only child and always wanted a sibling I didn't know any of my cousins and had a well looked after but lonely childhood I ve always had a very shy side to me although I can be gregarious on the right company. I was called diffident I love company but after a while I have to retreat to being on my own I m a bit stubborn and independent I purposely had more than one child ( 3) but they are geographically apart and don't seem very close in life either so that backfired

I was an only child but from a very early age I played with the little girl in the house opposite & we did everything together. We lived in each other's houses, went to school together, shared holidays,worked together, got married same year etc. Now in our 60s we are still close friends.
I think I had the best of both worlds. If we ever started to fight or disagree our mums suggested it was time for the visiting one to go home so we never came to blows. She had an older brother & I really wanted an older brother although Mum did try to explain why that wasn't possible!
I wouldn't say I was spoiled but I didn't miss out on anything. Ballet lessons & horse riding lessons were possible when some of my friends had to choose which they wanted.Mum was quite strict-I certainly had to behave myself!
My Grandmother & Grandad spoiled me- but that's their job- I think I spoil my DGC too. More by loving me & spending time with me than actual material things TBH.
My Mum was very young when she had me so she would play with me more than most mums & so did Dad although he was at work all week.

I think I grew up as a very 'grown up' child as I mixed with my parent's friends a lot (who didn't have any children) so I got used to adult conversations.

Now I notice I do like my own company although I am also quite out-going & belong to a lot of clubs & groups. I do NEED time to myself though. I get a bit ratty if I am in company too long & need some 'me' time. I'm not sure if that is a symptom of being an only or just me.
Although there have been times when it would have been a comfort to have a sibling I was very glad when my parents died that it was only me as I have seen an awful lot of heartbreak & arguments with friends when it comes to who gets what & how the deceased is being dispatched!
My husband & a lot of my friends have little or no contact with their siblings. I'm very glad my sons are close!

Oh, Carole59 I too often wonder why some people feel they just have to comment on a thread which is entirely irrelevant to them!

I'm an only child and was the only grandchild to both sets of grandparents. My grandmother brought me up as my mother was out at work. I rarely saw my paternal grandparents though I never knew why.
I grew up able to stand up for myself and very gregarious. I married relatively late, but we had two lovely children, now widowed I have three fantastic grandchildren. My sons partner has a large extended family and I get included in their family gatherings which is something I never knew.
I often wish I had a brother or sister to share later life with.

Calm down there Carolest59 I have an only child so shouldn't I have commented?

I am an only child, I was never spoilt (money was tight) but had a happy childhood. I too am very independent, I have to actually make myself accept offers of help from others (they might stop offering if I keep saying no). I love my own company but also like having friends around, I can be shy /reticent/quiet when I first meet people but as I gain confidence I am very chatty & sometimes I'm the "gobby" one, not in a bad way I hope

As I'm on my own again after DH died I am glad I can enjoy my own company. My DD is an "only" & very independent, DGS is another "only" but not for much longer, new baby due in May, he can't wait to have a sibling

Not really a contribution to this forum although I am an only child,why is it that every time there's a discussion about only children we get comments from people who WERNT only children!!!Not interested in their stories personally about their brothers,sisters etc when the topic is only children!!

I am an only child my husband is one of four. We have two children who I am close to and one grandson who I adore. My family means everything to me and friends are more like my sisters. I find it takes me awhile to trust people and I don't mind my own company like many of you have said. Don't like large family gatherings feel lost. I wasn't spoilt was very very close to my mum who I lost last year through vascular dementia I would have loved a brother or sister to help with the funeral etc my dad bless him couldn't handle it. I feel totally responsible for my dad although my lovely family do help. So I think its swings and rounderbouts

I was an only child of - in those days - older parents (late 30s !!) I had a very happy unspoilt childhood, no cousins that I knew but lots of friends. I always wanted a family and happily had four children. It is only seeing the wonderful relationship between them and the fun their children (my 6 dear grandchildren) have that I have thought how great it would have been to have siblings. However I share in their love and they have embraced my second husband who I married since they all left home, so think I am very fortunate! As my Mum used to say - got to count your blessings!

Yes I am an only child. I had a happy childhood and never missed siblings growing up as I had lots of mum and dad time,but was never spoilt only with love and affection. I miss siblings now that I'm older,I would love to have sisters or brother to pop and see and share our lives together like I see my friends do with there's.I am confident tho and like my own company and I'm not afraid to venture into things alone, I'm also very socialable and have a handful of very close long term friends. I have 2 DDs who are close and get on very well.

Being and only child does teach you to be happy with your own company; however I found the biggest problem was that I felt completely responsible for my parents' happiness - there was nobody else to dilute the situation and if anything went wrong in my life my parents were sad about it too, without anything/one to take their minds off it. It all got rather intense at times. Also, there is hardly anyone else who remembers the family home and things that happened now my parents are gone; I find that quite hard and try to hold on to memories of rooms and furniture, visitors and events, as it seems wrong to forget it all.

I am an only child and always hated that . Consequently I was determined to have at least two children and did have two beautiful daughters. Very sadly the younger one took her own life aged 33 ,leaving two young daughters who I can't wait to see this week. They live300 miles away so that is a rare event.
I now feel so much for my elder daughter who has become 'an only' as a result.
Luckily she has two lovely sisters in law now who help to fill the gap just a little.
There was never a more wanted child than my younger daughter. Life can be so cruel at times.

Only one here too, typically 1950s upbringing, but my parents always let me take a friend on holiday with me. The one time that it struck me that I was truly alone was when Mum suddenly died, Dad went to pieces and the whole caboodle of arrangements fell to me. I so wished that I had someone to share my grief and decisions with.

I am the youngest and only girl with 4 brothers and we aren't close at all!!! As are none of my brothers! Being the only girl I was certainly spoiled by my Dad and my brothers when I was younger but as I got older my bros got fed up with me! My dear Dad died when I was 17 so my oldest brother tried to become Dad and moan about my mini skirts etc! So although technically not an only child, I was different and even now I hate lending my stuff out, although sharing isn't a problem. I only had one son who gives everything away!!! I love my own company but am a very chatty person as well.

No, Im a middle child between two sisters. They aren't close at all but I'm close to both of them. Son is an only child though and due to me (single parent) knowing I could do a fab job with one is a fantastic, quietly confident, well balanced young man who has lots of good friends due to not being able to rely on siblings. I asked him the other day if he regrets not having a brother or sister and he said "goodness gracious mum, no - I had you all to myself"