What would be your "Alternative Facts"?

My hair is thick and always looks well-groomed.
I can speak 15 languages fluently.
I have read "Les Miserables" and "War and Peace" (in the original languages, of course).
My house is always immaculate and my filing is always up to date.
I have elegant, narrow and beautiful feet and can easily find shoes which fit and are comfortable.
I run regularly and enjoy it.

I am a 5ft 7in multi millionaire who is always right

Oh no, Trump couldn't get near me because of the admiring crowd clustered around me.

I think that is why those pictures show the gathering areas outside so much less crowded than when Obama was inaugurated. I didn't make that one, I was making my biopic.

I don't work
I live a perfectly healthy lifestyle and visit the gym daily
I have dozens of girlfriends I do lunch with most days and entertain on a lavish scale most weekends
I'm always perfectly manicured with amazing thick glossy hair
I'm married to Adonis
My house keeper comes in every day to clean my mansion
Oh and I'm 35 of course and a perfect size 10

With "Alternative Facts" Maggiemaybe you are free to tell him your own story (and it serves him right for nodding off and leaving it uneaten)

I never eat a chocolate orange in one go

Me neither, whitewave I just can't imagine what happened to DH's while he had a little zzzz on the sofa last night....

Can we assume you didn't stand in hand grasping distance from Trump MOnica

nothing else

really tight - and a jacket.

You didn't wear leather trousers did you MOnica ?

Just got back from Trump's Inauguration, went to all the balls, when I came in I looked so stunning everyone's eyes were on me, not Melania or any of Trump's daughters.

That is why I am back so soon, I was deported. But as Teresa said to me, sometimes one just looks SOOOO good!!

I'm doing dry January
I haven't just opened (one) of the remaining boxes of chocolate truffles and scoffed 3
My energy levels are like those of a 20 year old
I haven't gained any weight in recent years
My dogs behave perfectly at all times
So do all my adult children and grandchildren
I Never get irritable on the politics threads
I love the new POTUS and think he's a breath of fresh air.

Well don't like to boast
I have Nobel peace prize
And a face that would sink launch a thousand ships

..always happy
never sad
always calm
never mad
lustrous hair
rosy cheeks
am on the riviera
gonna stay for six more weeks.......

I never eat a chocolate orange in one go

Deedaa -

Badenkate I can say quite truthfully that men can't take their eyes off me when I wear a bikini. Unfortunately they are laughing hysterically at the same time

I am 46
I am a perfect 10 (but wear a 12)
Words of wisdom fall from my perfectly formed kissable lips
I am a domestic goddess
And I don't tell fibs

I have long, lustrous auburn hair
My manicure is always immaculate
I have boundless energy, constantly active and always elegant and calm
I maintain my size 10 figure effortlessly
I am in great demand as an after dinner speaker and travel the world

I could go on .

I have exquisite taste and never buy clothes that don't suit me.
I only eat food that have under 20 calories/lb
When I wear my bikini on the beach, all the men cannot take their eyes off me.
I always walk at least 10000 steps a day
My only fault is my innate modesty

I can eat anything I like, sit on the sofa all day, and not put on an ounce of weight.

Should have read toy boy. iPad living it's own life again!

I am 29 and have recently bought a very nice ship from the man who owes the pensioners of a certain shop chain so that he could pay them the money back. I am inviting you all to join me. Please bring a bottle and a tomboy if you wish.

Jalima very modest. Only 2 men and a dog turned up to see Trump's inauguration.

...and the dog did what dogs do!