I love them dearly but .......

Two days at the most is enough for me (and for them). I have a friend whose daughter and grandchildren stay with her every school holiday for 2 or 3 weeks. It would drive me mad. I love my family but I also love me own space.

Although most of us are grandparents, I am sure we vary quite widely in age. I had my children in my early 20s but they all waited til their 30s - I would have loved to be a young granny but it was not to be so I feel I have to accept the exhaustion as part of the package!

We only have one, aged almost ten, and look forward to every opportunity to be with him. As he gets older, those opportunities will become fewer. He is mostly lots of fun, and co-operative, but when he can't have his way, he brings to bear his own particularly form of negotiating skill. It's like a Chinese water torture, but with oodles of added charm. He is better at whittling his parents down than he is me (grandad is just a total pushover anyway), for I am made of stern stuff , but it is wearing in a different way from his boisterous, shouty, messy younger self. I love him to his very bones, but I still reach for the merlot as soon as he has gone out the door.

Wait until they grow up - much easier then!!

As my grandaughter lives with us we are her guardian/grandparents we are also her parents too, so I see things in a different way. It's much harder for us but I wanted her and we went to court to get a guardianship. She is 16 now she was 6 when she came to live with us and we love her to bits, even if at times she drives us nuts.

I think its because you don't see them very often Coppernob.Our grandchildren live close by and we were probably more geared up to them coming and often staying overnight.
Things have got easier of late as the oldest ones are now 23 and two at 18. The younger ones rarely stay as they have their other grandparents close by. The middle ones too are growing older and rarely need to stay.
I loved having them and miss them staying as often now but I can honestly say there were times when I was glad to see them go.

My grandchildren are older now, but from 'toddlerhood' to about six, they all threw tantrums from time to time and had lots of fun exhausting Grandma and Grandpa. Our house looked like a bomb hit it after every visit. Fortunately, it's just a phase and it doesn't last. They grow up quickly then become teenagers and stare at their iPhones the whole time. You won't even know they're there. Our youngest GC is seven. She now enjoys rearranging Grandma's nick nacks whenever she visits....and so life goes on.

Exaustion and grandchildren come together, but how miserable it is when they've gone home. I wish I lived closer to my GC, we'd have such fun, there would have to be rules and time limits though, otherwise it would be too much and no fun at all.

Coppernob like name by the way you are definetly like most of us on forum I remember when my children left home it took me ages to get used to the house being quiet and mainly tidy all the time so when we have family get togethers it can sometimes feel overwhelming, saying that arnt we lucky that we do see them I really feel for those estranged from theirs through no fault of there own .

I can understand the feelings of grandparents who do not get to see their grandchildren Sarahellen, and that is hard. It's also very tiring having little ones in the house after being one ones own usually. My grandchildren are grown up now, I found it easier when I was younger, I would not like to have very young children to care for now I am in my seventies. Some people love having a houseful of people, I have a friend with five children and they all go to her house with their families. It would be a nightmare for me as I'm much more of a loner ? Only child syndrome. We all have different relationships with families and there is no right or wrong here just different.

Oh what's relief to know we are not unnatural grandparents from so many sympathetic posts. We are 77, not yet totally decrepit, but 77. We have 3 year old gs full day a week and he is not a scrap of bother and we are laughing with him all the time. But we are thoroughly exhausted by hometime and pleased to have his goodbye hugs. I think a big part of the tiredness is the feeling of responsibility for him and constantly being safety conscious. When we have the other three as well their parents are here too and it's not half as intense.

You are totally normal. Our twelfth grandchild has just been born but is the first one in England. We love them all dearly but when they come over , sometimes it's the parents that drive me crazy not the kids. I'm really enjoying having a grandchild nearby but a bit apprehensive about what will be when she is a bit older and comes over. I'd love my house to be a second home for her and any siblings that arrive PG but my house isn't aschild friendly as it once was, neither am I as young as I was!!

All normal range I hear.

I'm in a very different position, as my three little DGS all live within easy striking distance and I see a lot of them. I can't imagine being as close to them when they're older and less likely to want to stay at Nanna's house, so I just enjoy them while I can, exhausting and messy and sticky and loud though they are . DGS1 and parents moved in with us on two occasions when they were between houses, and I shocked myself (and everybody else!) by bursting into tears the first time when they left after six months (I was prepared the second time!). So although I know that of course you're not a bad granny, Coppernob, I can't agree with others who've said that we all feel the same.

Hang in there everyone! My eldest granddaughter and husband, who live nearby, are coming this evening to join us for my birthday Chinese Meal. They will willingly put away Christmas decorations into the loft, which I find difficult these days - boxes and ladders are a no- no! They grow up to be useful! Although looking forward to two of the young ones, who live away, singing Happy birthday on FaceTime later!

OP - you are definitely not a bad Grandma, or if you are then I am one, too. I find small children so badly behaved these days.

Wonderful to see them when they arrive,more wonderful to see them leave!

No Coppernob you're not a bad GP, my DGS is only 6 & lives about 10 miles from me now. I don't actually see a lot of him, with school, football & swimming. I do go over & visit but don't overstay my welcome - my DD would soon tell me

When my Step-Daughter used to come & visit frequently (we lived nearer her when GC were young) both DH & myself used to breathe a sigh of relief when they went although they were well behaved. On the other hand we used to dread Step-Son & his children coming to visit, only for a few hours but the GC were totally out of control

I feel happier now I can pop over for an hour or so & DD can come to me for short visits. Will probably see more of them from May when DGC2 is expected

We have our twins to stay for 3 nights roughly every 6 weeks. Big brother visits too but at other times as there is a big age difference. We love having them to stay and tolerated all the mess, poop, vomit etc that often came with them in the early days. Nowadays it tends to be just general mess and chaos. Obviously, we wouldn't have it any other way but that doesn't stop us feeling very, very glad when we hand them back.

Oh, I remember those days so well. Now, at eleven and fifteen, it's the wiiU and Instagram all the time they're here. I'm a bit sad about it tbh. But it is exhausting.

I am smiling as I read this. This is one of our days for looking after 1yr old GD. Papa has just taken her for a walk in the pouring rain to visit his brother to give me a rest, as I have a terrible chest infection. I am sitting among all the debris with no energy to clear it up. Mashed strawberries, blue berries etc on newly shampooed rug. However, I wouldn't have it any other way.

No Coppernob you're definitely not a bad Granny or a dreadful Mother!!!! OH and I look after our 2 year old Granddaughter for 3 days every other week and after the first two days are absolutely exhausted. OH has just turned 70 and I'm 65 and it's tough. We love her to bits and she is a good little girl,but it's hard work. I do agree with Mildred in that children often behave better when their parents are not around. This is certainly the case with our little one, she turns into a little monster when Mummy or Daddy pick her up and then we're just counting the minutes until they go. I think the older you are as a Granny the less able you are to cope with the upheaval young children create. She is our 6th Grandchild and I was 47 when my first one was born and looking back it was a 'breeze' compared to looking after this one.

It's lovely to have them but it's equally nice to have your house to yourself once they go home. I love seeing mine, but I also enjoy being by myself, so appreciate both sides of the argument.

Lovely to see them arrive and lovely to see their rear window as they drive away.

We didn't live near either DM or DMiL so stayed with each of them for several days at a time.
I made sure the children tidied up after themselves and I did most of the cooking, washing up and laundry too.
Perhaps those of you who feel overwhelmed by the presence of DCs and DGCs could ask for a bit of help from the DCs?

We love to have our GC here, and to stay from time to time, but when they go home we are so happy to slump down with the newspapers and a pot of coffee, and then catch up on the TV we want to see over the next few evenings. They are the light of my life,but they are also exhausting, and I tell their parents that too, so that they can gleefully wave as they drive away leaving them with us and not feel that they are bad parents! I was so grateful to be able to stay at home with my DC when they were small, but also delighted if my M and D offered to have them for the day - it was bliss. We are all the same I'm sure, and of anyone says they couldn't bear to part with their children or GC then they must be saintly, and exceptional!