Social vertigo.

My H was a Chartered surveyor and he first qualified as a mine surveyor. He always told stuffy people who judged by their occupation that he worked "down the pit" we must have lost many posh friends that way.

My DH was a scaffolder and took great delight (mental age 18) in telling people he guaranteed his erections, he is such a child at times

I knew a former soldier who, when asked what he did for the umpteenth time at a prestigious event, replied that he was a trained killer

Teehee. My husband trained as an electrician. He always gives that as his job (it isn't) and we giggle at people's reactions - either their faces drop and they "write him off", or, they ask him to come and fix their lights at home!

(I'm always dead sober by the way, when I do social vertigo stuff).

To a man boasting about his tax evasion deals when on a cruise. His wife was an intrusive conversationalist. She asked me what DH did . I told her he was a tax inspector. He never left the cabin after that.

Probably not quite the same thing, but I became fed up with people asking me what I did – meaning what was my job as if that labelled the sort of person I was. So I told themI was a traffic warden. That shut them up.

Yep, been there, done that. Had a boob accident with alcohol involved when I was drunk at a party, fell about laughing, literally,lying on the floor laughing, my boobs fell out of my alter neck top. No bra on. It was a few years ago so less droopy than now. I don't know who saw, but I probably had blushes the day after!

Oh dear, in the past, many times. I rather think my vertigo was alcohol fuelled though, so perhaps doesn't count?

I do this (didn't know there was a name for it).

I have (both times at work conferences):

Left a queue for food to crawl to the buffet table on all fours and "collapsed", hand outstretched.

Also: gone up to random people and offered a fist-bump.

When I am out with husband, I am able to control it.

Many times

Where shall I start....do you know the feeling the next day .....oh I didn't..did I

Now now Downtoearth you can't leave it there. What did you do?

yes

I prefer to stand on the sidelines and watch others -making-- an exhibition of their selves entertain me

Not sure about me in this respect but at events where name badges are required I always want to swop mine or give myself another name. Either that or I just don't wear it.