That was a hard three weeks

Oh kitty I wouldn't upset you for the world!!

I am tearful (no, honestly!) Until I saw the

DH wants to know what on earth is the matter .....

It's not you then penstemmon!

That's not funny Jalima

Well, whilst waiting for the supper/ tea/dinner( I know that matters to some!) to cook and the OH to return from football I have had one eye on the TV (Cromwell!) and the other reading this thread..is that sad??

I like kittylesters sort of challenge to find a doppleganger!

I shop in Sainsbury/Waitrose/Co-op as my 3 local supermarkets, the local butcher, fishmonger and greengrocer and sometimes the local Farmer's Market too. If I am near a Lidl I pop in there for a few favourite items and plan to stock up on Stollen and Lebkuchen from there soon.
I still do have a cleaner because I am too daft to say I don't really need her now I am no longer working much having worked ft most of my working life.
I have just booked a trip to , hopefully, see the Northern Lights.
I have 2 x DD who live nearby with DGC
I do live in SE England in my own home with no pets (deceased but with my OH and one of my brothers who has mental health difficulties.
I like a glass of wine..if I like it I do not care if it cost under a fiver but would rarely pay over a tenner!!
I have just made my third lot of rhubarb gin

So sweet .....

???

Don't you bloody dare Db!!

So tempting to call you kittylitter from now on though but it might not accord with my image of "assumed superiority"
PSCasawan it is possible to like the theatre EVEN Shakespeare, without being an intellectual snob - especially when your DD works in it

Kittylester - I genuinely hadn't seen the misprint in your name, so I am very sorry for that, but that is all I am sorry for.

Phew! Thank you both.

kittylester

Not one of us is completely like anyone else.

And, (thank you Ariadne) I am normally a happy-go-lucky person but I get really pissed off when people try to be clever and then can't back off when they have got it wrong!

Casawan, I hope the misspelling of my name was just fat fingers and not a deliberate attempt to be rude.

Thank you for the compliment Anya, though being thought 'nice' is not necessarily a compliment. I do try to be 'nice' as none of us have any idea what people have going on in their real lives so should tread carefully until we know. Everyone has their cross to bear.

I think Elegran has put really well what I say every time we have one of these threads. No-one is saying that new posters shouldn't post but they should consider what they are saying before they charge in. They could easily upset someone thoughtlessly. Having been here a long time, I know some of what DB has going on (among many others on GN) and a glib remark can easily wound.

As far as stereotypes go:

I live in the Midlands and shop at Sainsbury's, Waitrose, Aldi and the Co-op - that even has me confused.

I have a cleaner - despite living in a 3 bed semi - because I don't like cleaning.

I haven't 'gone out to work' since I got married.

I have 5 children but don't live in a council house.

I have a black cat but no ferrets.

I too have an elderly mother (mine is 92 and has been on End of Life Care since January) who treated me appallingly but I see her regularly.

One of my daughters married an Idiot.

My eldest son had a stroke at the age of 35 while living on the other side of the world. His wife divorced him.

I hope I fit one of your stereotypes Casawan because I don't know anyone completely like me.

Who is upset at being challenged, Jalima? Not me
Not you Casawan
(you're not new are you? Not as new as me anyway )

I don't think it's you who's being referred to, Casawan.

Apart from that one post which could possibly have been taken either way, you haven't been confrontational at all, and as you say, you're not a newcomer.

Who is upset at being challenged, Jalima? Not me. It's what I would expect on any sensible forum. It strikes me that there are a lot of people who are very keen to take offence at a bit of lighthearted skitting, and very eager to put us newcomers (still after 2 years?) back in our boxes. Surely there is room for all.

Apart from the long-standing members and the newbies there is also a significant group of highly critical posters who reckon they've been here long enough to be very aggressive/assertive and can impose their views on everyone who dares to disagree!
Over the last few weeks I've become very aware of a couple who say very litle until a particular chosen victim appears and then they let loose both barrels! These are the same posters who see cliques forming as soon as two or more posters disagree with them.
It's becoming more unpleasant and tedious with every passing day.
'Not sure if it's a forum I want to be part of'.
Let's hope that if anyone flounces off in a puff of frustration she does in fact reach that conclusion and so the picking and shooting down may cease.
I see the arrows coming from a different source!

Oh dear, another post that's become acerbic. I don't know what's happening or why but I do know it seems generally infantile to me - 'You said I was abc' 'No I didn't, I said you are xyz'

I'm not going to read through countless posts to find what or who started it all in which post. To my mind I seem to have read the same names time and again throwing virtual sticks and stones across several threads. I'm sure the cause of most trouble is misunderstandings over how someone has interpreted what someone else said, because we can't hear tone of voice or see body language.

I don't want to leave GN yet and would rather try to find the camaraderie and respect that first enticed me here. I took a break from posting for a few days but the callousness is still prevalent. PLEASE GNers put your gripes and cynicism about fellow posters away and take a minute to preview your message before sending it.

I appear to tick all of Casawan's original boxes.
Charleygirl

There's too much disapproval around at the moment of the new member who just jumps in and says it as it is. Like the OP. Why should they have to serve an apprenticeship?

Absolutely no reason at all Anya - however, it is very noticeable that some of the newer members who are jumping in and saying it as it is (or how they perceive it) then get upset if their opinion is challenged in any way.

I have had a look at MN occasionally, and coming back to GN is like arriving in a calm pool after enduring the rapids!

Rigby enjoy your break, I do hope the Sauvignon Blanc is to your liking, if not you can always make the gravy with it.

Rigby here's some New Zealand Sauvignon Blanc for you, makes a nice change. Cheers!

Oh, and just remember you cannot be in the club unless you live the SE, hire a cleaner (or pretend to), shop in Waitrose (or pretend to), drink expensive wine (or pretend to), have travelled the world (or pretend to), and so on, and so on.
There are plenty of lovely people who aren't in that inside clique though, so chill and enjoy some amusing reading. Just be sure you don't turn into 'one of them'.

Um, er, as the one who posted about the 6 quid bottles of wine - I'd just like to say that it was in response to Rigby's rather rude remark about Australian Chardonnay.

As the grandmother of an Australian Chardonnay I did take exception to the remark

(who will believe me )

ps I do shop in Waitrose, but I also shop in Lidl (I'm just like that advert, or is that for Aldi?)
I don't live in the SE
I have to travel across the world to see Chardonnay
I would love to have a cleaner atm as I can't do it myself for the time being - any volunteers?

KatyK - which supermarket? Asda have a good offer on as well, 6 bottles for £24 but I expect it has all gone by now. However, Rigby does advise not buying Australian and I think at least two of the bottles were from there.

I would agree that GN is certainly changing lately with the influx of some very upfront, dare I say confrontational, newcomers.

I don't think anyone was telling them what they could or could not post, only to consider how they would speak to the neighbours if they had moved physically to somewhere that they were new.

If they started off by telling everyone what a nasty lot they were, would they be surprised at the reaction they received? It would probably be something like "So why did you move here, then?"

It does seem, though, that some of the posters who have been members since the inception seem to think that they can tell other newer members what they can, or cannot post. Why should longevity of membership be a factor of perceived superiority?

So true Jud.

? Anya trying to work out which of your categories I currently fit into. Gullible? Grumpy? I do speak out sometimes but would prefer not to hurt people's feelings. There is too much pain in the world already.

I can't imagine why anyone would find Casawan's remarks "witty". Had I fitted the categories that, according to her, made me part of some sort of snobby "clique" I would feel I was being got at. I don't see what's funny about livening up an evening by trying to upset people or cause arguments.