What to get my grandson for his birthday

What a brilliant thread - have laughed out loud for the first time in a week! Thanks. The answer is probably "money - "That's what I want" (as the song goes)

So he won't dance too fast, presumably?

He's having brake dance lessons

Didn't notice anyone mocking dance lessons. The veracity of the whole thread, possibly, yes

My GS is 12 tomorrow - actually in about 25 minutes from now! Hard cash is what he wants. He is very good at saving up for what he really wants - usually computer related and I wouldn't be any good at choosing anything like that for him.

No indeed jingl my DGS (6) has been selected for free ballet lessons for a year from Royal Ballet. Not mocking the dance lessons.

Too right, Jings, look what ballet classes did for Carlos Acosta! His father sent him to keep him off the streets and out of trouble!

Is it ballet, or tap maybe?

There's nothing actually funny about a boy having dance lessons.

Well, you're sorted with the dance lessons then!

It's not a wind up

It would make it a bit less obvious that this is a wind-up if you even pretended to be puzzled by the responses you're getting, Grantj10...

They're the ones who don't change their spots, aren't they, breeze?

Oh god, I'm going to bed before we go the 'leotard' route!

Oh good, so you have realised it is called "predictive" text, not what you called it before

I don't think he could attend dance lessons In his onesie

Oh stop it. My sides ache. Elrel inspired!

I now have an image of him dancing in his onesie and Uggs

I ment dance lessons not Dane predictive text is annoying me again

Or Sleep, even...

Slepe

The next Billy Elliot or Wayne wotsit?

Err... predictive text?

No Jingl s/he definitely said "DANE"

So he's learning to become a Viking, or a Lego piece.