Granimosity

I think what's a bit sad, is the fact that mothers of daughters feel they have an advantage. I love my DS and my DGC more than words can possibly say and I want to see them just as much as "supergran". My DS has had to explain that to my DIL, who felt it natural that Christmas etc., should always be spent with her mother.

Why would it turn into a row? And what would be so funny about that? You have lost me with that thought.

I'm never going to beat "supergran" to the podium, so I don't even try.

It would be quite funy if this thread turned into an all out row and had to be deleted. All because of what Cari said to the Daily Mail.

Shall we try?

All 4 of my DGC are my 2 DDs so I do think I have the edge because the girls automatically turn to their Mum.

Lucky for us both other sets of GPs don't want to babysit, or have sleepovers with the relevant DGC . They don't seem to care and despite all living very close unless my DD and SIL take the children they don't see them.

I think that's sad for my DGC and my SILs .

On the the other hand I can overdose on the little ones as much as I like

If I started on my D's in-laws I wouldn't know when to stop. They have zero interest in the GC who are now 16 and13 and now that D and H are separated will never see them again unless my D calls to see them when she visits us,which she has the last couple of times.
Their father flew 3500 miles away to a new life last Friday with his new love and his parents have never once referred to it or asked how the children are.
Bitter moi??

And that's three minutes of my life I will never get back.

Ah yes. The post in question reminds me of the Two Ronnies sketch. "He looks up to him and he looks down to him..."

I wish people would say who they're quoting!

What is strange about make up/ high heals, and having a Husband. I think your green eyed monster is rearing it's head. Good job your DGD has one glamorous GM, because little girls LOVE glamour.

All our 6 dgc are the children of our 3 daughters so I think we start at an advantage.

They are all the only grandchildren on the 'other' sides so those grandparents are all a bit more focused on the children. I'm proud of the fact that our daughters are very fair as far as 'sharing out' visits etc.

Although we will never be best friends with the 'others', we rub along quite well when we meet at family occasions.

She is so strange, wears high heels, lots of make up, trendy clothes and has a husband.

Is that really strange? Why shouldn't she wear such things? Lots of Gransnetters have husbands.

Never mind anything else, where are all the Daily Mail haters and slaters ...I mean, Gransnet forums providing fodder for a DM article?! Whatever next.

Pistols at dawn.
The other gps have never liked me from the start, they ask to see DGD when they find I have seen her. DD worked out exactly the same time to spend with DGD for both of us but now she is at school I have less time than the other one. She is so strange, wears high heels, lots of make up, trendy clothes and has a husband. I only wear make up you cant see, flat boots I wear leggings or jeans and waterproofs. I cant do 'glamour' no matter how I try. So were very different and I get the impression that the other gran looks down upon me, she is quite well off and I don't earn much, however she drinks like a fish and I look down on her as I don't lke alcohol. I would have loved a granny friend and had imagined the two of us taking the baby for a walk to the park together but it was not to be, DD hates her too as she spoils the little one.
There are just too many differences which causes the rivalry.

Wow, it did, didn't it ...

I have 3 daughters and certainly don't have a closer relationship with the gcs than the SiL's parents.
The GPs who live next door to my DD and family are obviously much closer and when I stay, as I am at present for 2 months, I have just about got the relationship going when it's time for me to leave again. These GP's don't exactly help by constantly cuddling and spoiling the children in front of me which obviously endears the little darlings to them (grrrh). One set of GPs I hardly know which suits me fine as under other circumstances, I wouldn't be drawn to them in any way; they have as much contact with our mutual GCs as I do, but the third 'lot' and I get on like a house on fire and I appreciate that they have much more daily contact than I do, helping with childcare etc. I regret not being closer to all my grandchildren, both in miles and relationship, but that's life.......

I consider myself very fortunate. DiL1's parents don't live close enough and Granny made it quite clear that she'd done her bit bringing up her own children. We do get along well with them when they visit but I make sure I take a back seat.
DiL2's parents live local and we share full time child minding for 2 children, we work well together and they have become good friends.
I would be quite happy for the other grandparents to have them more than we do. ?

I agree with rosesarered too. Dils mum is lovely and I don't feel we are in competition. I don't know how she feels but I think she is glad to have some one to share babysitting duties with. Ds and dil both work and have the occasional weekend away. Both I and the other gran work full-time and I know I am glad to have another Gran to help out too.

I don't think my grandchildren have a favourite granny Daddima. If they do, they don't make a song and dance about it.

No rivalry whatsoever here, I'm with rosesarered on this.

DS' in laws live abroad, visit several times a year for two weeks at a time; we live 120 miles away, and probably physically see dgs less,vbut FaceTime is weekly event.

I hate the thought of it becoming some kind of competition or getting one up on the other ?

Maybe I'm just lucky; there is a language barrier when we meet the in-laws, but we do get on very well (and I will learn Italian this year, no excuses once I retire!)

No rivalry or problems here either. Chinese GP's see them every week but do absolutely nothing with the boys. Spanish GP's do a great deal of childcare but when I go give me every opportunity to spend as much time as I can with the GS's. I can't ask for more and the Spanish GP's are now good friends even though we all struggle with the two languages - thank goodness for phrase books and dictionaries and a sense of humour! Mandarin is a different matter but even without the language problem I don't think there would be a meeting of minds (I have no idea what they think about me !!)

D I Ls mum lives five minutes away,we live just over an hour,so don't see them as often,but definitely no rivalry.The kids are always very excited to see us.Christmas etc,we spend all together,I like DILs mum.Shes on her own,so I wouldn't begrudge her at all.

Thankfully we've never had this problem because we live "abroad" and so do our various grandchildren. We get to see them when they can spare the time.
Remembering my own grandparents, I think Daddima is right because we actually lived with Mum's parents for a few years. Dad's parents were just around the corner. I think there may well been have some hostility between them because they were so different - MGM was a bit snobby and PGM was very rough and ready, down to earth.

Stansgran, it can be hard can't it? We do try to always put the children first but we're not saints.

Anya. It's a forum. A public one.