Hoist by my own petard.....

What a bunch of weirdoes, Dot.
Why ever didn't one of them say straight out that no-one eats the pastry??

I love Thorntons chocs but this year I have enough to last me forever and a day.
I'm not complaining, really, but I think next year I'll be on a diet.

I gave my neighbours some home made chocolate truffles along with their Christmas cards a few years back. I didn't receive one card back! But at least the neighbours were still alive in the New Year!

I think you may be taking this fairly lighthearted thread a bit too seriously JanT8.

Seriously, does there need to be any angst?? This is an elderly person who is 'giving' !! The important thing is that she has been able to gift something, whether or not you can use it or not is really immaterial!
To be able to give is always preferable than receiving!!

When I was growing up my grandparents had a holiday cottage with an allotment and chickens. The caretaker always sent them a box at Christmas containing a chicken and vegetables to go with it. The chicken always arrived absolutely stinking, and they never had the heart to ask her not to send it!

My husband's cousin has started giving me a box of hard soap for Christmas, I only ever use the liquid kind, I was obviously too effusive with the first box, and it is the same every Christmas. The local hospice raffle benefits!

A warning. If you regift with the comment 'someone gave me this but I don't like it', make sure it's not to the person who gave it to you in the first place. They will not appreciate it, especially if it was expensive.

There is an app called OLIO which has just gone nationwide today, it's free to download but I haven't used it yet. Seems to be about sharing unwanted food with neighbours or someone nearby, sound as though it will work along the same lines as that fabulous site Streetlife, except this is just for food. Maybe those jars won't go to waste as someone might like them?

A relative gave us marmalade with gold shavings in, saying how lovely it made it. It was a waste product from her business she runs. (She gives 1 year old children peanuts and whole grapes!)
DH says thank you very much that's lovely. Later on she asks if we have enjoyed it , DH says yes, I say I do not like marmalade with bits in. Sort of good cop, bad cop and we never got given anymore, hoorah!

Charities are always greatful for any donations there is always a tombola somewhere in our village

Numberplease: Maybe your daughter doesn't like your cooking either but is too polite to tell you (or comment on a forum?!) Maybe by children don't like my cooking? Maybe no one likes the presents I give them? Maybe it doesn't matter that much!

An elderly neighbour used to make blackberry and apple jam from the brambles in her garden and the windfalls . Her eyesight was poor so there was always extra protein in the mix. One year the batch was explosive to say the least and took a long time to clear up the mess at the back of a big cupboard.

Maybe we could take all these things to local meet ups and swap! Somebody else may love my chutney and I could swap it for their scented candle.

Years ago I had a friend who wore a hideous fur hat in the winter. I said it was nice. To my horror she managed to source a similar hat for me and I got it for Christmas. I never wore it. I always made an excuse that it was too warm etc., but that I wore it on colder days when she wasn't with me!

My late mother would always, no matter what the gift, make it clear she wasn't too keen on it, saying things like "Very nice, dear but ....". My DD's mother- in-law never comments, just smiles when she opens a gift. I always say "How lovely! Thank you so much!", as I know how upsetting it is, when you have taken the time to make or choose a gift for it not to be appreciated. The only time I did do anything, was after several Christmases and birthdays, choosing nice presents for a friend and receiving a small gift from a charity shop that cost next to nothing in return (she had plenty of money, so that wasn't the problem), I eventually suggested that, as we had grand-children to think about these days, it would be a good idea to simply send a card and forget the present. She was very happy with that.

Not me - I buy up lots of fragranced tea-lights when they are on offer.

I was given 4 scented candles this Christmas - they seem to have taken over from the oil-stick things of a couple of years back. I am sure one of them was re-gifted to me. Bah humbug!

Re the chutney - we love it in our house!!!

I was once given a scented candle for a present and as I loathe them I stored it in the regifting cupboard. In a moment of madness I got it out and lit it for a dinner party where it was commented on and, to my horror, became the gift of choice for everyone ever after.

One of my friends was extremely well off and her candle gift was a Jo Malone version which I took back to John Lewis who gladly swapped it for a nice purse. But who spends fifty quid on a CANDLE?

Ah, at least chutney can be disposed of in some way ... I have recently been given what I consider to be a hideous electric candle in a lantern. My friend was so pleased with herself as she had noted my fondness for candles (I have a lot of REAL tea-lights dotted around) and we see each other regularly so I feel it has to be kept out and on display. Oh grrrrr! Is it just me, or would you also avoid giving a display ornament, just in case you got it wrong?!

The first time I went to meet my prospective parents-in-law, I was given a lovely salad grown on his dad's allotment. The small, grey slug I found nestling amongst the lettuce caused my m-i-l serious embarrassment and possibly set the tone for our future relationship, which was one of mutual respect and friendship. I didn't fuss about the slug, just pushed it to one side and carried on eating

My father was a pharmaceutical chemist while my mother ran the shop. Every year one of their suppliers in Cornwall would send them a pot of Clotted Cream for Christmas and they relied on this to go with the Xmas pud. Until one year, when they received a chicken instead, having already bought their bird (they were devastated, as it arrived on Christmas Eve - too late to find the clotted cream and they didn't need any more poultry!). They never again relied on expectation!

This thread reminded me of one of the first meals I had with my soon to be in-laws. Eileen, my lovely mum in law- had made a steak and onion pie with mash and vegetables and gravy. I was given a generous slice and really struggled to eat the pastry as it was rock hard. I did notice that Eileen, Alfie (my Dad in law to be) and Alf (fiance) were all watching me and thought that perhaps I had spilt some dinner. As we were clearing the table Eileen asked me if I had enjoyed the meal. Trying to be diplomatic I said it was all very nice. To my surprise she told me that no-one ever ate her pastry, it was just used to keep the pie contents together! She showed me the remnants on all their plates! She used to ask me to bake pies/quiche etc for the family as my pastry was nice!

Shepherds pie is good thing to transport and reheat - I can see why she brings that.

Could you tell her that you had a shepherds pie at a friend's house which was exceptionally nice (spellchecker wanted to put mice there - I think not!) When you asked how it had been made, you heard that in it was ??? (fill in whatever you think was missing in your daughter's. Maybe it was just seasoning - there is a reluctance to season anything at all these days, to avoid over-doing the salt)

LuckyDucky, we can`t all plead nausea though, especially every time! As for anything she disliked, nothing springs to mind, apart from certain things she disliked as a child and as a teenager. She`s invited us for tea this Friday, but it should be OK, it`s going to be a fish and chip supper.

number
Have you made anything in the past your daughter disliked? Then use that as a yard stick gently, in a jocular way. It depends on your relationship with your daughter and how often she makes it.

You could plead nausea, due to a medication. That works.