Keeping up with the other children

No,not at all but my eldest ones are only eight. Perhaps it will come with the passing years.

No, but when I see what they have, I'm at a loss as to what they could possibly need or want anyway. Perhaps it's their school mates that envy them. Who can tell?

Mine are still young but even if they were older I can't imagine what they would feel they needed as anno says.

The child in question is nearly 13 and all this stuff has only arisen since secondary school. I guess most children will try and acquire stuff by telling parents that other children have it - I remember doing that when I wanted my first bra! - but some of these items are in a very different league - expensive electronic items, the latest bike etc. etc. It all seems a bit sad to me that their happiness should depend so much on these things.

I guess it's the consumer society indoctrination that make people feel that the next thing they buy is going to make them happy, thereby no longer realising what things they already have that are actually making them happy now. I'm not being holier than though by about it, by the way, as I am as guilty of this as the next man/woman .

ahhh the green eyed monster...

ds wants what everyone else has... normal I think for his age. We have considerably less gadgets than their school mates. (year two what I got for christmas letters were posted on the class website... well some children got two expensive gadgets.. eg x box and a bike) needed a lie down to recover

I have never had a lot of money as an adult. I find it easier to live without a lot because Iwas brought up without a lot. life is easier if you can manage to save for what you want and you get excited by a five ounds shopping spree.

I try to get the happy medium of getting some stuff and teaching them to save. though this rather backfired when ds bought a second hand remote controlled car from the charity shop with tooth fairy money and I needed a second mortgage to pay for the batteries

"year two what I got for christmas letters were posted on the class website."

I agree with those who say it's best to manage with little but when this sort of thing happens it's no wonder kids who don't get so much stuff feel upset about it.

Maybe this constant flow of things, at their slightest whim, contributes to the lack of resilience among young people, which is being discussed on another thread.

My own children had to do without a lot of things because we just didn't have the money and I suspect that the grandchildren will be the same. I think we managed to find things to enjoy without buying a lot of expensive "stuff" On the other hand I can still remember desperately wanting things that other people at school had and it was a pretty miserable feeling.

Discussed this with a friend recently we both brought up families on a limited income in an area where there were some affluent families. Partly from ideology and partly through necessity our kids didn't have the same things as many they knew. They seemed perfectly happy at the time but since have talked about feeling left out because they had less. My DGD is asking for things now, some he gets some he doesn't. I don't think it is too harmful for a child to realise some people have more than others. My DGD is complaining at the moment because the new phone I got for my birthday is better than his. Mind you he is right when he says "But you don't even know how to use it properly Granny!!"

I had this during the summer when GS age 6 was staying and playing with the neighbour's boy age 9 who has so much it is difficult to know where to start ! X Box, ipad, 10 Nerf guns (and he wants another !!!), enough Lego (about £1500's worth in my estimation) to build a Battleship, very large climbing frame and a top of the range bike to name just a little. Fortunately GS did understand that much of what was next door would not go in the suitcase to take back to Beijing and things there are very expensive. I gave him my old digital camera and the free binoculars from our National Trust membership and he was thrilled as believe it or not, boy next door did not have either! He was even more thrilled when some of his rather good photos won prizes at the village show.