Pornography

Absent your message at 7.31 re nugget !

Horrible, absent

I think that sex with a multiple amputee is a specialist section of porn and not commonplace. Generally porn is heterosexual man and woman stuff or girl on girl. I've not seen and gay porn but I guess it's got similar story lines.

Anything other than that comes under specialist/fetish porn and, although still relatively easily available, is not as common.

Porn is a difficult area. I wouldn't want to see it banned completely but neither do I want it to be easily available to teenagers. Young people need to know that sex is more than wham bam thank you ma'am. Porn is make believe with sexual content. We learn to understand that things that happen in most movies are made up and/or exaggerated (car chases, explosions that people walk away from, gun battles where six men with automatics fail to hit the hero once whilst he with a manual shoots one with each bullet he has, etc). But young people view porn before they have the experience to realise it's not like real life and this leads to some of them thinking that sex is purely physical and every girl is up for it even when she says no. We need to educate our children about relationships and respect of self and others. If that means discussing porn in the classroom then so be it.

I was a PHSE subject leader and one of the things we taught our Year 6 (the year they did the puberty and sex stuff) was that if their mate/s told them they'd had sex they were probably lying and that sex was special not just a physical act. With this in mind they should think carefully the first time. Did they really feel ready? Did they really want to have sex with that person and in that place? If the answer was no to any of those questions then they shouldn't have sex. We pushed love a lot (Catholic school but no harm in saying sex should be as part of a loving relationship). Sadly most of the children esp. the girls were surprised that they didn't have to have sex when they had a boyfriend. We never told them sex outside of marriage was wrong (our priest didn't agree with me about this ) but we told them that having sex just to keep a boyfriend/girlfriend was as if the person really loved them he/she would wait until they were ready and not put them under pressure.

During the 'don't be shy ask anything' session it was obvious who had viewed porn and we tried to put it into perspective.

feetlebaum I know little about heterosexual and even less about homosexual pornography but what I do know about the former suggests to me that it is designed to present women - or girls - as sexual objects whose only function is to provide sexual satisfaction for men. So-called girl-on-girl pornography is designed to titillate men and, once again, is intended to present women as sexual objects. Topless women may not qualify as pornography in your eyes, although it certainly does in the eyes of many women.

Just for the record when I questioned whether we wanted our grandsons' dreams to be about sexual activity with a multiple amputee - a common theme in internet porn apparently - I wasn't necessarily suggesting it was inspirational, but might be a nightmare.

Images of 'topless' women hardly qualify as pornography, or even erotica.

Why would the 'nugget' nonsense attract your adolescent grandson. Not that anyone can forecast what will, or won't press someone's buttons. Most of us have one or other slight 'kink' even if we choose not to express it. I remember an elderly lady who defined 'pornography' as 'whatever doesn't turn that particular judge on...'

As for 'top-shelf magazines' - when I was at school in the ealy 50s, there was a lad who used to nick magazines from stalls in Petticoat Lane Market. He would then auction them - right outside the head's office window!

In my day if kids got hold of a "top-shelf" magazine or one of those little plastic pretend cameras with half a dozen black and white photographs of topless women, they were passed around the whole playground. (Where on earth did the pretend cameras come from? Surely not Christmas crackers?) These days porn ?? far nastier than black and white photographs of topless women ?? is equally available. I think discussions about it should be included in lessons that look at social relationships. I think that it would be a good idea to separate lessons in human biology from the discussions about sexual attitudes and relationships. Of course, this may already happen and I am totally out of touch.

For the record, if anyone wants to share my disgust, having sex with a "nugget" is, apparently, having sex with a woman who has had all her limbs amputated. Just what we all want our adolescent grandsons to dream about.

10 - 15 years ago or thereabouts, when mine were early secondary school age,the actual purely sex ed lessons comprised of one visit to the GP surgery concerning sex ed and health, and one sex ed lesson per year maximum.
They were part of PGCE? lessons. I dont know if it is different now.

"pron"???? - sorry!

I hate to think of my GC getting into pron and not knowing what is or isn't the norm in a loving relationship.

My DDs learned through a book from Sweden that we bought called "Our New Baby" - it is a cartoon story of a family - a loving close-knit family. It pulled no punches - all the facts were there and were illustrated. They read it from the age of about 4 or 5. We supplemented it with more info - contraception etc. - as time went by. But they were fully in possession of the basic facts from a very young age.

It is dreadful to think that some children's first knowledge of sex is through porn. It sets up inappropriate expectations, and the idea that boys expect girls to shave their pubes or give blow jobs willy-nilly (?) is so sad.

Above all else children need to have self-respect and to know that they matter and they do not have to do anything they do not wish to.

Sex education teachers should be simply that, not the history teacher at the school doubling as an expert.They should be honest, forthright and totally unembarrassed by anything.The tv programme that others mention sounded good, we need more teaching staff like that.
Ithought you could put controls on phones, much as on the computer, but am not very tech savvy, so maybe not.

I used to teach and from my experience teachers don't like teaching sex-ed because none of us have ever been trained in that subject. There was, in the schools where I worked, a reliance on worksheets and videos. There was no provision for discussion, or for single sex lessons, which I feel might help some children. Nor was it ever taken into account that children mature at different times, so that one 12 year old might be curious and ready, while another is still very childlike and not interested. At least that is how it was then. What I suspect hasn't changed is the level of training needed to deliver the subject properly.

Nelliemoser, trouble is I dont think there is hardly a teacher that is happy to teach it - I could be wrong.

I too was taken aback by the recent program on sex education by that Danish teacher and amazed at the warped attitude of the boys. Proper sex education is an absolute must, now more than ever before TV and Internet.
It's endangering relationships and the very essence of society.
Already 10 years ago I feared that this toothpaste will not go back into the tube once allowed to ooze out into the children's domain. But.....I WAS encouraged that it CAN be halted when I saw the change of attitude towards their female schoolmates after a few lessons from the Danish teacher. More Danish teachers please !!!

I formed the view that pornography is degrading and potentially dangerous for those involved when I was a young woman. I've tried to become more liberal as I recognise that not everyone shares this view but without success. I agree, this country should offer the kind of sex and relationship education more common in other northern european/scandinavian countries.

Learning about sex by watching pornography can't be beneficial to young boys or girls. I wish that it wasn't available on mobiles but it is. I wonder if there is a way to block it for under 18's.

I honestly think too much pornograph watching will have a bad effect and make pornograpy with more extreme acts seem the norm.

shysals information about the boys comments on the sex lessons are quite alarming to me.

If you are going to bring this education into schools, which IMO should be done you will really need educators who are well trained and totally comfortable themselves about tackling these issues.

Anyone who is not happy with teaching this subject should not try.

Porn is a couple of clicks away, 11 year olds can get anything on their smart phones. It's a real worry. Out of curiousity I must admit, I did look at some of this free stuff and quickly turned it off. It's pretty sickening.

"I recently watched a TV programme called, I think, Sex in Class."

That was the program I linked on the rape thread, there was still a couple of days left to watch on catch-up at that time. It's a scandal that proper sex education like that isn't on the curriculum, but I can't see it happening as long as there are prudes and conservatives (with a small 'c') thwarting it. I resent the fact that there was no sex education at all when I was at school, and now that we have the internet 'educating' children it's even more important than ever.

VQ I get 110,000,000 hits via Plusnet, and I haven't opted in for anything.

Ooh I stand corrected. When I searched on Google Chrome I got the nothing found message but when I searched on Edge the results came up.

I'm sorry I think I've misled you all.

I recently watched a TV programme called, I think, Sex in Class. A Scandinavian teacher was having very frank conversations with British teenagers. I was shocked at the attitude of the boys, who had all watched porn. They were very disrespectful towards the girls, even saying that they must permit certain sexual acts which they found distasteful out of respect for the boys. On being shown photos of naked girls, they all said they would hate to have relations with ones with any pubic hair. For homework the boys were given a razor and shaving foam and told to remove their body hair each day and see how they liked the battle against re-growth! There was a marked change in attitude by the end of the programme, with the girls feeling more able to voice their wishes too.
There was resistance to the option of adopting the teaching method for more schools, but it seemed like a good idea.

I got several pages worth by entering 'free porn for women' - some sites included bestiality! Didn't actually investigate further, but apparently they are all free.

It must be different. I just googled the same phrase and got this:

Your search - free porn for women - did not match any documents.

I'll confess to being curious and concerned if it was legal but I got bold and I googled ' free porn for women' and it was there. Maybe it's easier in the U.S.?

Many years ago my daughter was telling us about a webcam in Africa which showed the wild animals. We thought this would be good to watch and as we had just bought our first computer, googled 'wild life in Africa'. Even though OH and I were not young we were very innocent and couldn't believe the results!

I was the person who posted that porn is harder to access.

Until recently anyone could access porn by deliberately looking for it or by accident (I once typed in Snow White and didn't' get the fairy story I was expecting

Now in order to access porn you have to contact your ISP and ask for it to be unblocked.

Whilst I have no objection to porn in itself, the worry is that young people see it before they have experienced proper relationships and some think this is the way sex should be. It leads some young men into thinking that all women are available at any time and that no doesn't necessarily mean no and both genders to think of sex as a physical act without any emotional aspect.

I have no idea what 'nugget' means in a sexual context - even after googling...