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Worry, worry, worry

(65 Posts)
Teetime Mon 01-Jun-15 11:19:26

katyK its sounds like me are stuck in the same negative thinking spiral - we don't get asked out much and when we do we don't want to go!!! LOL.

I got a lovely message from a kind Gransnetter today so I am going to try to be much more positive and do some NLP on myself!! Have a worry free day if you can. My grannie used to say ' never trouble trouble till trouble troubles you'. smile

henetha Mon 01-Jun-15 11:05:12

When I wake up I often find myself thinking, "Now, what have a got to worry about today?" sad
I think it's living alone that gives us time to worry more, and having no-one at hand to discuss worries with, so they multiply.

KatyK Mon 01-Jun-15 11:01:45

Yes I worry about absolutely everything. My confidence is rock bottom (not that it has ever been high). I question everything I do. Am I doing this right? I bet others would do it better. Am I a bad wife/mother? Will someone in my family come to harm from illness/terrorism etc? Do I eat/drink too much? Or not enough? Has everything I have ever done been the wrong thing to do? Do people dislike me? Like Teetime, I think I may come over as cold as I can't stand all that kissy kissy stuff either. DH and I don't get invited to many things and I wonder if it's because people don't like me/us. I have always thought we were nice, kind people but have worried lately that I have got that wrong sad I agree that it is negative thinking. It's a habit with me. Must try harder. The above posts are reassuring, as I realise it's not just me!

AshTree Mon 01-Jun-15 10:43:41

I'm a bit of a worrier too. I try not to be, but it's hard. I don't worry about myself much (although there are times, of course...), it's mostly about other people, especially husband, children and grandchildren, of course.
And then there are the bigger worries, the ones about the world in general, climate change, political unrest, terrorism - how all of this will affect my children and grandchildren, especially after we are gone. How ridiculous is that! I never felt, years ago, that it was my parents' responsibility to protect me from danger once I was well into adulthood, and I doubt my children feel they still need our protection! And anyway, how, I ask myself, could I possibly do anything to protect my 40 something children from climate change or terrorism? But it's a mum thing, you know, part of the JD to have the sticking plaster ready at all times. So I worry sad

merlotgran Mon 01-Jun-15 10:03:34

Remember the radio programme Mrs Dales Diary? It used to nearly always begin with Mrs Dale stating, 'I'm worried about Jim!' It became a family catchphrase in our house if anyone was having a bad time. grin

I refuse to be a worrier because my mother used to dump all her worries on me while she sailed through life with a smile on her face because I'm a gritter of teeth and get on with it kind of person.

I'm sure it's true that you become more of a worrier as you get older though.

Sillyoldbird Mon 01-Jun-15 09:53:45

Ooooooh I do wish I was like hildajenniJ.

But most of you sound just as neurotic (sorry!) as I am. AndyF I have no idea what to do but coming on here and nattering on to people about it seems to help me.

Marelli Mon 01-Jun-15 09:49:31

Does it not come down to the fact though, that if things have happened to your family in the past, that you fear they're going to happen again? And how will the family member cope if it happens again, etc?
I don't worry about my health - or anything to do with me, really - only how can I divert bad things happening to my loved ones.
I don't do much socialising, apart from a lunch with pals now and again. I actually can't really be bothered doing more than that!
Like chloe, I have to have my phone with me at all times.

hildajenniJ Mon 01-Jun-15 09:19:27

Worry? What's that! I don't worry about anything. If I or my family have a problem I try to find a solution. Worrying about things doesn't solve anything. I have always been a happy little woman, with a fairly carefree attitude to life. My late mother was a terrible worrier, and always said she wished she could be like me.

Teetime Mon 01-Jun-15 09:19:01

I'm not really a worrier BUT I find I am thinking more negatively about life as a whole. I am concerned about not being very popular and how others see me. I probably come over as a bit cold as I don't go in for the kissy kissy dwarling stuff much and I can be rather factual which I'm told is a bit scary. What to do about it? I don't know. I certainly feel less and less like socialising- my small talk is non existent and I don't find other people jokes that funny so when everyone else is laughing like drains I've probably got a bored expression on. No hope really.

Jane10 Mon 01-Jun-15 09:00:05

My family laugh at me for being a worrier. I find myself worrying in advance of things that only might happen and usually don't occur! I'm really good at worrying but one positive aspect is that it makes me plan ahead to circumvent unpleasant outcomes. I read a study recently that said that it was an intelligent thing to do. That cheered me up (briefly!)

Andyf Mon 01-Jun-15 08:59:49

Yes I'm getting worse also, worrying, over thinking, negative thinking. My friends say the same.
What can we do about it?

chloe1984 Mon 01-Jun-15 08:58:06

the older I get the less I care about what other people think of me. However I worry constantly about my family,never worry about my health or money ( never had much to worry over really) was always a fairly happy go lucky type of person until I was about fortyish and then seemed to start fretting over stuff that had happened , stuff that might happen or indeed stuff that could never happen always feel the need to leave my phone on ' just in case' but am going away for a couple of days next week and have promised myself that I will turn it off and just access it once a day...here's hoping I can.

Sillyoldbird Mon 01-Jun-15 08:56:06

At 57, you would think I had stopped worrying about what other people think. But I'm afraid I've not managed to shake that one off!

Sorry to hear your a worrier too. Perhaps we should start a club offering mutual support?! grin

I despair of myself sometimes.

Marelli Mon 01-Jun-15 08:49:39

I'm also a worrier, Siilyoldbird. Over the years I've stopped worrying about what people think of me (they're only other people, after all!) but I do worry about my family etc.

Sillyoldbird Mon 01-Jun-15 08:39:29

Wasn't sure which section to post this in. I thought about health but opted for 'other'.

Just wanted to ask, does anyone else find that they worry about everything as they get older? I admit I've always been a worrier but I'm getting much, much worse. I worry about anything and everything. I even worry about having nothing to worry about.

Sometimes I think I'm losing the plot. shock