20 month old granddaughter doesn't like me!

That is such a familiar scene to me - but now I am DGS's favourite granny. As others have said here - I did not invade his space, bided my time and as a result he loves visiting me as often as he can.

She is then more likely to return if she knows that she has choices of her own.

You may be down her pecking order at the moment. But that doesnt mean it is going to stay that way.

And if I were you, I would be the first to let her go if others are on the scene. That way she is free if she wants to be.

Same scenario for me my youngest grandson is also 20mths and I don't see him often he is the same if we are alone he's ok with me but if he sees a better option ie: parent or other grandmum he will struggle to get to them.

Its only natural that he will favour those he knows best.. he's just a baby after all and doesn't know me really at all. Don't take it to heart its not done with any malice on the little ones part and I'm sure in a couple of years when she knows and remembers you better you will wonder why you took it so badly. As the others have suggested don't try to force to hug,kiss or cuddle you till she is ready..

When one of my grand daughters was about 3 I was staying with them and she said a couple of times "you don't live here", with a rather hostile look. Which was true, but it upset me. She said the same to her other Grandma, and she was even more upset than me!
As Gillybob said she's not a kissy-huggy child.
Anyway the next time I went to stay she didn't say anything hostile, but kept her distance, now (6 years later) she's ok.
I think it's to do with attitude to relative strangers, maybe insecurity, language development etc.
I'm almost sure she'll grow out of it, Danericbob, when she can understand that you're her Daddy's Mum.

Do you have Skype? You could see her and talk to her on that, to keep you in her mind when you can't be there in person.

Crossed posts. Gillybob We think of our grandchildren in terms of kisses and hugs, but it takes two to make a cuddle.

Stop the kissing and hugging while she doesn't enjoy it - you are invading her space, and you wouldn't like it if anyone did that to you, would you?

I assume that your username is the names of your sons, not your own? You say that you are the mother of the Dad, but there are Grandads on this site too.

She is your first grandchild and you have probably forgotten that when your sons were tiny, you and their father were at the centre of their lives, and they preferred them to anyone else. She is old enough to express her opinions now when she sees what she considers a better option appearing. She has competion for their attention now there is a little sister, so she won't want to miss a chance to get in there with them.

Don't take it personally - she will come round to you again if you are patient. See her as often as you can, be friendly and chat to her and play with her, but don't oppress her with cuddles unless she is in the mood.

I don't think its anything personal against you at all, she is only 20 months old. Could it be perhaps that she is not a kissy huggy type of child?
Perhaps it's because she doesn't see as much of you as the other grandparents (you did say you live far away) making you a little unfamiliar? Have you tried not kissing/hugging her at all but just getting down and playing with her?