Being carefree

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Xx

Dragonfly

And Lona. X

Thank you, Iam and rose. It was a lovely, carefree hiatus and gave me a chance to draw breath and regroup. X

Me too! Dragonfly

I empathised with your post Dragonfly about the desire to have a break from having so many people depending on you, needing you.

Dragonfly

I'm glad you had that week.

I had three years of first husband then eldest daughter having terminal cancer jings. And said daughter giving birth to a child with Down syndrome. And father being diagnosed with first throat then prostate cancer. And MiL being told she had cancer which turned out to be TB. And all of them needing so much. So one meagre week of having nobody expecting me to put things right was bliss.

I am contented with my lot and generally happy, but I'm not sure about carefree.

I don't think I have been totally carefree since about age 9 and doing the 11+
There is always something to worry about, usually about 4.00 am, often silly little things but nonetheless they still stop me being completely carefree.

I think the older we get, the harder it becomes to be truly 'carefree'.

My own most carefree years were with my first husband, before we had children. Since becoming a mother I've never been carefree, nor can I foresee being so in the future...(for various reasons!)

I think having no one depending on me, relying on me or leaning on me, would make me miserable. I would hate it.

I think it depends - I was certainly happy that week because for the first time in a long time, I truly had no worries, nobody depending on me to sort things, nobody leaning on me or relying on me to make better things that couldn't be made better. So yes, having lived with constant worry and grief for three years, being carefree made me happy.

There's cheerful, eh?

Does being carefree equate with happiness? I think you can can be without a care in the world, but that old black cloud can still descend.

I have had one never-to-be-forgotten, blissfully carefree week in the last umpteen years. After three dreadfully sad years, my sister in law persuaded me to fly - for the first time in my life - to Italy, to spend a week with her, her husband and my niece, nephew and his girlfriend, at their villa. I felt loved, cherished, spoiled and totally carefree, thrilled to be abroad for the first time, blessed to be with my family. We laughed, ate, drank, swam, talked - and I healed a lot. For the first time in a long time, I didn't have to worry about a single thing.

Another who had an anxious childhood. My Mother struggled with 'nerves' and was hospitalised during the first ten years of us 3 children growing up. My Father was working long hours and like our Mother found it impossible to show us any love or affection and being the eldest I remember feeling 'Mum' to my brother and sister at 6 or 7 years old. My sister was 4 at the time and my brother 1.
But I was carefree when I married my OH at nineteen, he was 21. Our daughter was born just before my 21st birthday. We lived in a lovely old cottage, range and bread oven and beams, rented it for a very reasonable rent. We had no money but we were a very happy little family.

Yes, roses it sure is.

I didn't mean to be a Pollyanna, to all those who feel they haven't ever experienced it.

I saw this on a bumper sticker once "It's never too late to have a happy childhood".

I don't know if it's because I am the eldest of four and my mother was pretty dreadful, but I can't remember feeling carefree since the day I started school., no, since the age of four, when my mother would shut us all in a room so that she could have a nap and would leave me in charge. Even at the times when my marriages/children are not causing me bother, my mother and sisters are still managing to cause problems.

One of my sisters used to come and stay with me when her children and mine were tiny, for a week, quite frequently. I remember her telling me off sternly for never being able to say NO, then telling me that she had phoned her OH and told him not to bother collecting her, she had decided to stay for another week! I was both speechless and out of food. And clean bedding. I survived, and I am no longer such a doormat, but I do wish I had a thicker skin and could feel carefree. Say NO without feeling guilty for the next six months.

I'm happy with my life at the moment, but being carefree is different to being happy, or content with your lot, isn't it?

Nellie
I don't think I've ever been carefree, from about the age of 5. I remember waking up from a dream once when I had just started school. I was crying and my mother asked me what was the matter and I said 'I don't know what to write'.
My parents were both teachers and I was constantly worried that I wouldn't be clever enough for them.

But I recognise that I've been very fortunate in my life, I try to enjoy every day and to stop myself worrying about things over which I have no control.
I agree Grannyknot there are moments to savour, when you can feel carefree, usually in my garden or out in the hills somewhere.

Now (64) is a good age I think!

I think now is my time being carefree; 3 years into retirement and I love it. No deadlines no stress! Luckily, I am healthy and have enough money not to have to worry I also have a horse which is a childhood dream and gives me hours of exercise and company.
I now accept who and what I am . I change the things I can and accept that some things are beyond my control so are not worth worrying about.I live alone and my only son lives in Poland but Skype and Ryanair mean we are in constant contact.
I try very hard to banish guilt and worry as it is so easy to waste the now, feeling bad about the past or dreading the future( doesn't always work!)but life is too short.

Looking at being carefree rather than happy is a hard one to think about. Carefree probably never quite describes me, I usually find something to worry about. There were times, not right now that's for sure.

Actually trying to think about this at present just rather leaves me feeling more miserable about my boring present. Sorry to be a party pooper. Do carry on.

Oops pressed send too soon. Carpe diem indeed I meant to add.

I also feel carefree at times now, hopefully that will soon come more when I retire from FTE. In the meanwhile, I felt very carefree last year when husband and I were on Barra. At one point we were completely alone on a vast beach and with the endless sky above, I felt like a tiny, carefree speck.