How could I have been so dense?

We went away this weekend, and stayed in a lovely country pub in a tiny village near Melton Mowbray.

We went to bed fairly early at the pub, after a large meal and catching up on our emails etc. with a large drink in front of the fire, together with a nice but rather twee late-middle-aged couple, she was a bit clingy and ultra feminine, if you know what I mean. I read a little, it was lovely and quiet, the village was silent and all the locals had done their main weekend drinking the night before. Bliss.

Then, after a fairly short while, I was awoken by furious hammering at the door. I called out to ask who was there - no reply. Back to sleep.

I was awoken again an hour later, at around 1am, DBH too, again there was furious hammering. I thought maybe it was outside, the back door to the courtyard was below our room. Looked out of the window - nothing. Back to bed.

An hour later we were awoken again. This time I wondered if it was the central heating pipes being blocked with air, we decided that that must be what it was.

It happened again twice, at hourly intervals. Really incredibly loud. DBH slept through it better than I did. He got up at 7am and went downstairs to catch up on his emails as wifi in our room was poor, and I slowly and grumpily awoke after very little sleep. DBH came up and said that he had asked the owner what the noise was, and he couldn't think, but would check the heating.

We went down to breakfast, and the couple from the night before were already there. I went over to them, and asked if they had been awoken by all the banging the night before. She looked down and said nothing, he said Yes, it was them, the noise was their bed banging on the wall! I didn't know what to say! I just said, I had thought it was someone breaking in!

Viagra has a lot to answer for...

Anyway, we packed up our car after a rather quiet breakfast... and they both got into separate cars and drove off in separate directions!!!

We did laugh - but very tiredly! I bet he went home and said to his wife, the conference was very tiring, but the facilities were great!

DBH and pub owner now wondering where to buy Viagra. Pub owner relieved it was them, because the heating was turned off!