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We're not 'The Elderly'

(79 Posts)
loop50 Mon 17-Mar-14 10:44:06

We're more than that - we deserve some respect.

Whether we're 'younger, older people' or 'older, older people' (as coined at this link and in more depth. http://www.generationboomer.co.uk/boomer-news/)

I've made my point there.
HMG not always helping!

Mishap Mon 17-Mar-14 18:00:37

Language is a funny thing and goes in phases. Once the term spastic was entirely acceptable, then people started using it in a derogatory way, so a new word had to be found. As a social worker I spent the first half of my career helping clients, but that fell out of favour and they became users (always sounded like junkies to me!).

It all depends whether the word elderly is being used in a derogatory way or a respectful way - in many cultures elders are held in high esteem.

I personally have no problem with it. It would be nice to be able to choose when it applies to oneself; but maybe we just have to take things in the spirit they are meant. If someone is using the word to put someone down, then by all means object; if not, then I am happy with it.

apricot Mon 17-Mar-14 17:54:00

I don't like euphemisms or whatever word is PC at the moment. Most of them come from America, where nobody ever grows old (they're senior or elderly) and nobody dies (they pass or pass on or over)
I'm quite old and to my grandchildren I'm ancient. I shall never be elderly.

goldengirl Mon 17-Mar-14 16:54:35

I'm not elderly - until I look in the mirror! Today I've had my 6 monthly medical review which went well; went to Pilates which was good and had my 6 weekly session at the physio who said I had very good abs which made me feel a million dollars! Yippee grin

PRINTMISS Mon 17-Mar-14 16:39:35

Oh, surely it is all in the mind, - I don't care whether people think I am old (I am), and offer help if they think I am a bit past it - that is great, provided it is done with some respect - that is the word RESPECT. - At the Museum we have one or our little signs which sells quite well - it merely says 'Respect your elders, your time will come', and to be quite honest I think we earn respect, it is just not an entitlement because we have lived rather a long time.

FlicketyB Mon 17-Mar-14 16:30:20

Nonnie grin

Nonnie Mon 17-Mar-14 16:19:22

Just chatting with my neighbour and we came up with a definition of elderly locally. Its when you go to the tip and the nice men there offer to help! I went this morning with a very large bag and they didn't but helped another woman with 2 small bags. Therefore she is elderly and I am not. grin

rosequartz Mon 17-Mar-14 16:11:52

I have just had a look at the article only to find that I do not qualify as a 'boomer'. I must be elderly.

(I do feel a bit fragile today though, with a sudden cough and aching limbs. Does that make me vulnerable? A hot lemon, honey and cinnamon would be nice please, if anyone is looking out for elderly Gransnetters.)

FlicketyB Mon 17-Mar-14 16:04:29

It is like the way they constantly put the word 'vulnerable' in front of mentions of the old and elderly. In winter public information notices tell people to keep an eye on vulnerable elderly neighbours, with the inference that if people are old they are, by definition, vulnerable.

My DF lived to be 92 and could not possibly be described as vulnerable until the onset of his final illness and hospital admission, which was less than three months before he died. He was living in his own home without carers still active on the committees of three local organisations and happily driving a 100 miles or more to visit me or my sister. Shortly before his 92nd birthday he drove over to our house in France quite happily and well able to cope with driving on the other side of the road.

I think the problem is that older people are only in the news when they are vulnerable and oddly enough, the charities that so much to help those older people who do need help, do those of us who are going into old age fit, healthy and more than capable of running our own lives, a disservice by constantly harping on the problems older people have

But then we only hear about young people when they are unemployed, drunk, drugged or criminal, which does a disservice to all those young people who work hard, stay sober and off drugs and generally lead responsible lives.

loop50 Mon 17-Mar-14 15:59:12

Yes I think that's how the term 'the elderly' fits in our mind nowadays.

There is much evidence that the fitter we keep ourselves (as however we can) the more likely (it's never certain obviously) that we stave off illnesses.

And the more active we keep our minds - in tandem with keeping the blood/oxygen flowing through a level of fitness - the more likely (again not certain) we'll keep dementia at bay.

I think that's why some commentators would like us to abandon phrases including the 'elderly' and refer to older people.

Some good insights to all of that at that generationboomer link

www.generationboomer.co.uk

Nonnie Mon 17-Mar-14 15:15:39

I hope you are right loop perhaps I misread it. I just think that elderly is an awful lot older than me!

Perhaps elderly is when you need help to manage day to day things?

loop50 Mon 17-Mar-14 14:46:12

I don't think the article is saying 50 year olds are elderly. I think it talks to baby boomers (who are around 50-70 year olds nowadays) who wouldn't (in the majority) class themselves as really old.

I think it asks for regard for our even older populous and to look out for them. (After all we gonna be there one day).

janerowena Mon 17-Mar-14 13:51:48

The news article link

www.generationboomer.co.uk/stop-calling-older-people-elderly/

Elderly does equal frail to me, too. I am in my 50s and do have frail days. In fact sometimes they can be downright useful for getting out of things I don't want to do! In my mind, I think of elderly as roughly over 80, but I have met women recently (I bit the bullet and went to the local WI) who have astonished me, thinking they were at least 10 years younger. A pair of them even backpacked around the world for a year, last year, when they were both widowed the previous year. So I don't think we should take it personally, because some people will read it and think, Yes, I am elderly. My own mother is only 78 but very ill and looks suddenly ancient and refers to herself as an old lady. My MiL is only a little younger but skips off all over the world and looks 20 years younger than my poor mother, who only 10 years ago looked stunning for her age. Older olders sounds clumsy to me - and does renaming anything ever work? A village Elder was once someone who commanded respect. In our village, they still do. But in every age and society there will always be those who feel that their Elders should be sent out on an ice floe for the benefit of the polar bears and thus perpetuate the circle of life.

rosequartz Mon 17-Mar-14 13:51:35

I'm feeling a bit older (but not elderly) today as I seem to be fighting off a bug probably caught from one of the DGDs.

Oh dear, I will soon be on the way to 'elderly', thank you jinglbells!

jinglbellsfrocks Mon 17-Mar-14 13:38:37

I would say "elderly" starts at 70. "Old" at eighty-something.

jinglbellsfrocks Mon 17-Mar-14 13:37:01

I don't mind being "elderly". Somehow it doesn't sound as old as "old"!

TAB12 Mon 17-Mar-14 13:35:12

Galen Thank you, you made me laugh for the first time in days sunshine

Nonnie Mon 17-Mar-14 13:33:36

Just got back from the gym where I noticed that the weights on some of the machines I use are higher for me than for some half my age. I am not elderly!

Didn't have time to look at the article before but it seems they class 'elderly' as someone born in 1964! That makes them 50! How can anyone be elderly at 50? I won't be elderly for years.

loop50 Mon 17-Mar-14 13:20:04

It does throw up an image of 'frail' as ninathenana says above.

I know it might seem pc - but 'older people' just seems more respectful. maybe the comment at the article would help the debate.

janeainsworth Mon 17-Mar-14 12:06:43

Well having now read the article, I don't think it is disrespectful to describe a group of people as the elderly, any more than it is disrespectful to refer to the middle-aged, or the young.
I think it is the stereotyping that is the problem, not the words themselves.
Many groups of people in society get stereotyped, not just the elderly!

Galen Mon 17-Mar-14 11:27:45

Classes? Glasses!
I'm definitely losing the plot. Think I'll go back to bed and start again.

Galen Mon 17-Mar-14 11:26:48

This morning I'm definitely elderly.
Must have overdone it yesterday. Right shoulder and left ankle really painful.
Now where did I put my paracetamol, classes, false teeth, wig and bath chair?

loop50 Mon 17-Mar-14 11:22:44

I'm a younger older person 55ish.

Feeling the old arthritis occasionally - for me it's when I have too many tomatoes or pickled stuff. But when it's off (which is most of the time) I like to think I'm spritely and reasonably active. Golf, walking (a bit of the other with Mrs L55 occasionally!).

But we both had parents and grandparents in last several years who got (variously) heart disease, Breast Cancer and dementia.

Never thought of them as 'elderly' just ill. They were older people for sure but would like to think would think of anyone who gets debilitating illnesses as 'it could be me' and hope that society cares for them in the same way as if our own families.

Surely that's the way.

DebnCreme Mon 17-Mar-14 11:14:22

I suspect most of us on here have earned it but as a child I was brought up to offer it to the senior generation. This has stuck with me even to today. If I make it to 90 I will still be opening doors for the 55 year old 'oldies'. Mind you I try to return that respect when offered to me with a smile and a 'thank you'

ninathenana Mon 17-Mar-14 11:09:18

At 60 I would agree to being 'older' but I am not 'elderly' angry
Even if I was 80 -90 fit and healthy I wouldn't be pleased. Personally I think of 'elderly' as frail

janeainsworth Mon 17-Mar-14 11:07:28

Does anyone deserve respect?
Or do you have to earn it?