Teen travel

M0nica

Last summer , as soon as exams were over DGCD went first to France with a group of friends and then Greece.

This Easter she took herself to Paris for few days on a solo trip. She booked everything herself, flights and hotel and for 3 days wandered around Paris alone, a pretty giggly 18 year old. Now 19 she has several more trips to Europe planned alone and with friends.

Parents in this current generation seem to have forgotten that the main purpose of parenting is to nurture young people who can go out into the world with confidence, ready to earn their living, find their way about and ready to take part in civic society.

What we are currently getting is a generation that have been so coddled and gentled and protected from any danger, they are unable to cope with ordinary life. More are suffering from anxiety and depression, lacking in confidence and competence.

This mother has done her son no favours by protecting him so much.

Most stabbings occur within and between gangs. I go up to London regularly. I was there on a Saturday, a fortnight ago. I do not have my phone or wallet in view except when at the till in a shop and I wear my bag across my body.

I have been travelling on my own, in this country, foreign countries and travelling internationally for nearly 75 years and the worse that is happened to me is being goosed by a porter at Tehran Airport, when I was 15. The (male) crew member standing near me when this happened, whispered in my ear. ' If anyone does that to you again, knee him in the bollocks'

I completely agree.

Our own (& only) DGS has just been allowed to walk home from school, this last term of Primary School. It’s in the country and 2 short quiet roads from his home.

His dad was outraged, mum rightly (in our opinion) pushed for it to happen.

I think it’s important to remember that things like stranger rape, muggings, stabbings and other violent attacks, whilst horrific, are still relatively rare.

Children of much younger than your DGS commute every day within London and other busy cities.

Please try not too worry, so long as he’s well prepared, knows where he’s heading and is aware of the dangers of pickpockets, I think he’ll be fine.

Obviously anything and everything carries risks and for young people measured risks are a way for them to learn as they grow up.

Also, without wishing to be in any way rude, 17 isn’t particularly young.

I travelled by train from the UK to Bavaria for a German language course when I was 15 (1963). Our daughter travelled on her own to Dar es Salaam with a change at Doha when she was 18 to volunteer on a charity project. Was I concerned? Yes, of course, it's normal but I wouldn't have dreamed of trying to stop her. She had earned the money to pay for her trip (with a top up from us) and when she came home two months later, she did a 10 day turn around and then flew to China for another month of volunteering at a school in rural China. She had the most amazing experiences and some steep learning but it increased her confidence and resilience which has stayed with her to this day. Parents are much too overprotective and it is harmful.

Last summer , as soon as exams were over DGCD went first to France with a group of friends and then Greece.

This Easter she took herself to Paris for few days on a solo trip. She booked everything herself, flights and hotel and for 3 days wandered around Paris alone, a pretty giggly 18 year old. Now 19 she has several more trips to Europe planned alone and with friends.

Parents in this current generation seem to have forgotten that the main purpose of parenting is to nurture young people who can go out into the world with confidence, ready to earn their living, find their way about and ready to take part in civic society.

What we are currently getting is a generation that have been so coddled and gentled and protected from any danger, they are unable to cope with ordinary life. More are suffering from anxiety and depression, lacking in confidence and competence.

This mother has done her son no favours by protecting him so much.

Most stabbings occur within and between gangs. I go up to London regularly. I was there on a Saturday, a fortnight ago. I do not have my phone or wallet in view except when at the till in a shop and I wear my bag across my body.

I have been travelling on my own, in this country, foreign countries and travelling internationally for nearly 75 years and the worse that is happened to me is being goosed by a porter at Tehran Airport, when I was 15. The (male) crew member standing near me when this happened, whispered in my ear. ' If anyone does that to you again, knee him in the bollocks'

grumppa

I agree with Lathyrus3, but I would suggest that he has a pocket atlas of London to refer to. Mobile phones used as maps are vulnerable to being snatched.

A perfect target for the scroats.
Someone on their own studying a map of London.

I agree with Lathyrus3, but I would suggest that he has a pocket atlas of London to refer to. Mobile phones used as maps are vulnerable to being snatched.

Yes, stabbings and muggings do happen on the tube.
But taking into account that up to 5 million people a day travel on the tube the chance of this happening to your grandson are small.
All I would say is: walk with purpose. Don’t look as if you’re worried or afraid. Head up, not looking at the pavement.
Obviously no backpack, and no use of phone. That’s what the scroats want: a phone that is live.

I think I lost a stone worrying about my first grandson heading on his own to Edinburgh , he wanted to drive , luckily the cost prohibited that
He will be fine

Actually I was in London for a hospital appointment three weeks ago and a friend came to support me so we decided to stay for a couple of nights.

For three days we wandered around the centre of London, two old vulnerable ladies, peering at Google maps on our phones, going to the theatre, eating our lunch on a bench in the park, walking along the Embankment late at night to see the lit cityscape.

Not once did we encounter anything unpleasant or feel insecure or threatened.

In fact there was a point in the park with us on the bench amongst other elderly people, children racing around, business people enjoying their lunch hour in the sun and groups of teenagers just hanging about together when I wanted to take a video to say “This is London”.

The press and others on here might disagree with me but that was my experience.

I think I worry about my GC more than I ever did their parents!
When my 17 year old autistic grandson started College in South London it meant 2 trains and a walk through Croydon, not the most salubrious of areas ( apologies to Croydonites). His parents, who have to be the ones to lay down the rules initially, told him about safety. Not wearing his expensive ear buds or using his phone in public. Helping him plan the safest route to venues. His Mum tops up a credit card for him to use if there is ever a problem with public transport and he needs a taxi. He has all our numbers on his phone. Apart from covering all the bases, safety wise, then you have to let him go. You will still worry, it's natural, but it will open up a new world to him and he will gain confidence and a sense of achievement by doing it on his own.

It seems like only yesterday I was encouraging him to go into the shop alone and buy and pay for my shopping. His mum had never allowed him do this.

I’m sure he will cope, he needs to be cautious re mobile phones and bank cards.
He could be living independently in a year or so and needs to make a start.