Help I’m becoming obsessed after bad event

V3ra you misunderstand. I can’t wait to get back in the saddle. My committee is solidly behind me. I obsess about what I am going to do when I get back. How I am going to write to those who have removed me telling them I have served my time and now I can go back on. How I will never admit how much It has stressed me and how I stand by truth - carefully worded of course.

For your own well-being I would advise you to step back. Obviously this has really stung, I can imagine how upset you must be, but stressing like this will take its toll on you and life really is too short.
Find something you really enjoy ti do and find calming until this whole process is over.
All the best

I think the thing for you to do is think long and hard whether you actually want to return to the club after the six weeks is up, or find another one.

You certainly shouldn't be expected to support the person who is doing your role while you're banned, you're either banned or not surely 🙄

I can tell you're doing your best to limit the damage to the club during your absence, but is it what's best for you?
A clean break for a while might help you decide what you want to do in the future.

Good luck today Lathyrus.

Smileless it is not my club’s fault. It is the governing body who have taken exception. Had I hit someone and called them an effing whathave you, I would have got less. Only a few people know. Those that do think it’s ridiculous and have even given me the wink to help my temporary replacement which is just on the mechanics not on policy. So I am being punished but all I feel a sense of the futility of it and ultimately resentment. When I’m back holding the reins I will certainly be very careful so silenced by the woke. Now I know why people in work kow tow to all sorts of things these days.

But that’s just background really. I need to control this obsession before it controls me. Lathyrus is very helpful and I am writing in a journal but not every night. I did last night and ended up obsessing all night.

I think the journalling suggestion is a good one- and one I use now because I find it effective.

I also include lists of things I am grateful for in my life- which are many.

However, sometimes it is a good idea to move on from toxic environments and find calmer places to be...

Whilst I completely emphasise, I too would be looking for another club.

I can only suggest something like meditation to try and reduce the “obsession” . If it starts to be “all consuming” then something like CBT might help

Have you considered how you may feel when this 6 week ban is over and you're reinstated Avalon?

This article written by you has resulted in what must be a humiliating and rather public ban from the organisation, and yet you're instructing your temporary replacement. You're also saying that if you don't quietly accept what appears to me to be a gross injustice, that will make things bad for (your) club.

In your situation I would find another club.
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Not

Injustice always rankles - for and years, sometimes for generations.

Especially when you are silenced and are not allowed to speak the truth. I am on my wayto a meeting this morning where I will have to be in the company of a man that oversaw a great wrong and silenced me when I tried to speak about it. So your post really resonated with me

You are still in the throes of this and maybe there are still decisions to be made and things that can happen, so I think it’s natural that it is very much on your mind.

It may help to write it all down and then allocate a time each day when you are allowed to read what you have written and think about it, perhaps even share it with trusted friends. And then at other times consciously turn your mind to other things when it resurfaces.

And after this meeting which will stir it up for me, I will do my best to take my own advice🙂