Daughters behaviour - is this normal?

I wouldn’t necessarily have thought to protect the mattress for a six year old, even though accidents can and do happen at that age.

Mine were all dry at night from three years old, mostly, with the odd accident. I would have expected my daughter to let me know.

Try not to focus on it though, and just be pleased you can have them to stay. You’ve said you’ve always had a difficult relationship with your daughter, so you shouldn’t be too surprised by this.

Just scrub your mattress down, and protect it in the future.

I agree with you Joolsie your daughter should have warned you about the child's bedwetting. Don't get things out of proportion though, I don't really see she is not respecting you. It's a shame about the mattress but now you are aware of the problem you can deal with it in future. I hope things improve with your daughter and you continue to enjoy time with your grandchildren.

When young children have stayed with me I have always prepared the bed for the possibility of an accident during the night. Years ago I remember my granddaughter's worried little face as she got into bed at my home. She then asked me what would happen if she wet the bed. I was able to smile and reassure her that the bed was protected and not to worry. It's the responsibility of the home owner to be prepared.

She let you have her kids for several days, despite your rocky relationship -please appreciate that fact and do not mention anything

You also say you have a nice home - is it child proofed though?

A lot of times, the concept of "respect" is different for different people.

Why does she stop talking to you?

The mattress - while it is not ideal, an accident or two does not ruin it

I would suggest to put a waterproof mattress protector

Every mattress in our house is protected . It is not worth the risk not to .

I too have a DD who does not respect my belongings and even accuses me of being too clean, fussy, etc. All I run is a clean tidy home which she and her children soon wreck the minute they arrive. I would never dream of doing this in my mother's house or my DDs.

I can understand where you are coming from but to be honest did you ask your daughter if the kids slept through the night need lifting or waking etc
I would have put a mattress protector on anyway you obviously don’t have them to sleep or you would have known and small kids in a strange bed would always be a red flag
I can’t see that it is connected with your daughter disrespecting you she maybe never thought about it if it happens regularly

It is indeed a great shame that your daughter didn't warn you of the possibility of bed-wetting. BUT, you know your daughter can be trying. Also, even kids who have been dry for years can have bed-wetting episodes so some mattress protection is always a good idea on an expensive mattress.