Laundry woes

By repeatedly making up for his errors you are cementing them.
Personally I think you should hand over ALL the laundry work to him, lock stock and barrel. Just let him deal with the whole job from start to finish. He'll soon work out what works and what doesn't and act accordingly.
Instead of seeing it as "him interfering with the laundry" take a step back and be glad you have a partner who likes sharing household tasks.
You might look a bit rumpled for a few weeks but you'll have more free time!

OP this would drive me nuts! You have my entire sympathy. I'm a bit pedantic about all aspects of laundry and also how the dishwasher is loaded. Some things I'm happy to share BUT NOT THESE.

Has he always had this paranoia about the laundry and only the laundry? Peculiar......

I'm single so do all my own laundry, my way. However my SinL does their laundry and is very good at it. The one bugbear is putting clothes away. My D, and sometimes me, will sort the children's clothes, and put everything into designated drawers. SinL just puts the clothes away in whichever drawer has space! We have come to the conclusion that it's not worth the hassle to enforce especially as GC's aren't fussed as long as they have clean clothes.
Maybe a lighthearted list of guidelines on laundry care, posted in a prominent place, might help.

Oh sorry but I did laugh - he needs some sort of hobby if the machine having finished is SO important at 5.30 am. I don't know how you didn't hit him with some un-ironed washing! If he's so interested in the topic - hand it over to him. Maybe he can learn to be a good ironer and airer. I'd recommend getting a good tumble dryer but maybe that would only lead to more...

A lot of people seem to have the attitude that the husband is "helping" with laundry.
It's his laundry as much as hers, isn't it? He is entitled to take ownership.
This outdated belief comes from the same stable as calling a man looking after his own children single-handed for an evening "babysitting".

I take total charge of loading the washing machine my OH knows better than to interfer,he does however iron his own stuff as he is far better with an iron than I am.
When taking the washing out of the machine I must give everything a good shake and smooth out any creases it works well with the big stuff and when dried can be folded and put away so a large amount won't need ironing.

I think your husband has OCD . My husband has a thing about lights being left on and things being plugged in not in use . I tell my husband how he is getting on my nerves and sometimes it does end up in a dispute .

Thank good my DH doesn't even know how to turn the washing machine on! He's quick to complain though. He says I shrink all his sweaters and shirts, but I think he's put on weight! I now wash everything at low temperatures. His latest gripe is that stains aren't coming out. I said I can't win. It's either shrinking or staining.

You don't say whether your DH has always interfered in the laundry, or whether it is a new thing due to him having recently retired. If it is the first, then probably you cannot get him to agree to the following, but if he has recently retired this might help.

Sit him down and tell him that you would prefer to be left to do the washing, drying and ironing of all clothes, towels and bed linen yourself, but you would greatly appreciate him doing other tasks.

Ask him which jobs he would prefer to do and let him do them.

The only snag here is that if his hoovering and dusting are as bad as his laundering, it will probably drive you mad.

The only other solution is, if you are so well-off that you can pay for help in the house. I'm sure your husband will see the point of not doing jobs your cleaner is paid to do.

If his behaviour is not due to transitioning to retirement, I am afraid those who mention dementia might be right.

I used to think act that DH does nothing or very little about the house was a pain but I think I prefer it to your situation.
Mind you DH has a good 12 years to got before retirement so maybe I've got it all to come.
He can do all the flaming laundry if he wants to! I remember he COULD iron before we moved in together.

I'm sooo glad that I don't live with my OH therefore I'm not aware of his household 'quirks', if he has any. Younger men tend not to have the various annoying habits mentioned so often on these threads.
I do know that his shirts and bedlinen get professionally laundered but that's the extent of my knowledge re his laundry habits.
I'd go crazy if I had to put up with the OPs problem.

No he's always been like it just worse since he's retired, although he is very busy,

Oh we have a tumble dryer! He empties that whilst still damp and puts the clothes away!!

Over the years we have had all these conversations. This isn't dementia, not that sort of obsession. He just can't accept that I will do the laundry tasks in my own time. Sometimes it is helpful, but I often feel his help is criticism of my management.

I wonder if he’d like a book about it?
Some people like to know why and prefer to find out from an “expert” (i.e. not me!!!).
www.amazon.co.uk/dp/0743271459/ref=pd_sim_b_1?linkCode=g12&slotNum=1&imprToken=loTQmCXL--tRugGUSCjz8A&creativeASIN=0743271459&tag=gransnetforum-21

I think it good that he takes an interest in the washing. Lots of women would love it if their husbands just took an interest even if they did it wrong.

inishowen
I was reading this thread whist drinking hot choc and your comment made me laugh/splutter the mouthful not yet swallowed.
This is definitely a case of staining....on my jumper
I'll wash on a low temp to be sure it won't shrink.
Thanks for the laugh.

whist whilst

Can I say that as a mere male I regard washing machines as alien technology to be avoided whenever possible.

Seriously though, when my wife’s condition started to deteriorate i took over a lot of the household tasks. I do all the cooking and cleaning, but washing and ironing remain her domain - and that suits us both.

I think I'd have lost my rag if my dear late husband had behaved like this. I assume you've already bashed him over the head with a wet towel?
As you've already told him firmly but politely I suggest you raise your voice whilst simultaneously delivering a whack with each word.
"Do this again and you'll find your wet washing packed on the doorstep!"

My DH wouldn’t dream of interfering with the laundry, he’d get short shrift

ON is quite good at putting laundry on the line and getting it in. When we started to.love together he said there was no reason at all why I should do his ironing, he would continue to do his just like he always had. In 20 years he has done it once!!

For him the washing machine is a foreign country. They are all in Woman, and now in French Woman!

looks like he's got a touch off OCD ......as for the 5.30 am wake up call tell him to bugger off.tell him its not a good idea to wake you so early .tell him you wake up at 7 am .give him some time limits.as for the washing ,get him to iron it.. i can see why he takes the washing off the line when its damp its so it will iron better. so get him to do the ironing.make sure he needs to put it in airing cupboard for at least 4 hours. maybe he can write a list down of time to do things.

quizqueen, Snap! That's exactly what I do.

Ironing pants & socks! Who does that??