Ex Son in Law’s girlfriend dyed the children’s hair!!!!

As my granddaughter and I frequently had green hair when she was staying with me as a child, I'd think it was beautiful.

She's 25 now but just before Christmas she popped round to make my hair pastel rainbow coloured.
We looked fantastic imo.

Buffybee gransnet isn't just about grandchildren, it is about all kinds of issues that are relevant to the demographic of which I am part of. I am grandparent aged so came here initially to learn more about my pre-menopause symptom and stayed because I also find the financial threads relevant to me. I'm not starting out in life in other ways just because I had my children later so am in the same stages of life/health/property/caring for older relatives/pension planning as a lot of posters on here. Quite a few of my peers from school/university are grandparents so Im not in real life in a social bubble of parents of young children. It is in that way a better "fit" for me than younger mums forums.

There are plenty of grans on mumsnet too you know!

AND just because other posters usernames may say things like IAmAGranOhYesIAm doesn't mean they are!

It would be much better if such products were not readily available ?

I sometimes wonder why people feel the need to be on Gransnet when maybe Mumsnet would be more suitable for them, if they're not yet a Grandparent.
Makes me wonder if they've actually thrown their weight around on Mn and..........

& I don't think either of our employers would appreciate such nonsense either.

Its not a school application or a medical proceedure, its some temporary hair colour!

Likewise I would not appreciate having to get in touch with him every time a party activity is on offer to clear it with him before letting the kids join in...

& it would be up to the accompanying parent to decide which activities are appropriate to offer.

TBH if my DH phoned me for "consent" every time some face paints or hair chalk or temporary tattoos were on offer I would get irritated and tell him to use his own judgement!

Do you feel that a 2 year old could make an informed choice to have their head shaved?
You are very opinionated notanan2 but under scrutiny your opinions don't hold up.
Pot:kettle....

2 year olds dont plan any activities! Adults suggest things, and they can say yes or no.

Like does a 2 year old DECIDE to go to a funfair? No. Can it express whether or not it wants to go on a particular ride or have its face painted? Yes, a 2 yr old can.

Did the children enjoy it? If it was just a fun exercise I wouldn't get angry about it. Just be pleased they had a good time.

I found this on the Internet - To remove colored hairspray on your hair , combine baking soda with either shampoo or hot water, until it forms a paste. Apply the paste to the hair and allow it to set for a few minutes. Rinse it off and follow with a conditioner; as baking soda can dry your hair.

I'd like to make it clear that it worries me not what colour a parent/s etc wish to paint a child's hair or skin as people can do as they wish.
My main concern were the toxins in paint/dye preparations as lots of people have shown severe reactions to certain products and babies/small children no exception.

Before Christmas there was a warning against the " slime " toy for children. A harmless ? bit of fun that children enjoy but within the ingredients there lurked toxins which like any dye would be absorbed in the skin the same as a dye would be absorbed in the scalp.

Maybe I shouldn't care about children's safety,eh ? Afterall they're not mine !

Grammaretto. Another excellent post.

At the end of the day this just isn't the end of the world is it! But in this delicate situation I would tend to agree with Iam64 The most concerning statement is that the children's mum is "too intimidated!"

the issue of informed consent by children is important here. If the children are too young to give informed consent, as was the case in this OP, then I would expect both parents to have a view on hair cuts/colours. It isn't as simple as to suggest that the parent who has responsibility on that day, makes the decisions.
Parenting is a joint responsibility, it's tricky when the parents relationship has broken down but parents should still co-parent. that means no extreme hair cuts/colours without agreement of both parents.

ProudNanna doesn't say if the pink and blue hair dye is more than a spray but in principle, if either parent in a delicate situation as this one sounds like, were to treat the children in a way which went against the other parent's wishes, I would certainly expect an explanation and yes would trust them less
We aren't told if the children's father is good in other ways so it's hard to know the full story.
Are the DC returned warm, fed and happy? Are the baby's nappies changed? I ask because these are all signs of responsible parenting.

I've just looked after our 2 DGC for a few days and nights and DD and DSiL would have something to say if we'd dyed their hair or cut it without asking.

A two year old can't make a very informed decision, so that's why most of them take a parent everywhere with them, who decides on their behalf.
Presumably that is what the father did.

I might have missed something but I’m assuming this is the wash out temporary fun hair colour you just spray or paint on not the permanent dye you have to sit around for half an hour with. If so, not a huge problem. Who said they’d had their head shaved??

Ok! I'll answer for you!
No! A 2 year old child could not make an informed decision to have her head shaved, or have her hair coloured.
You said, at 23.08 * the Father was there to consent* regarding the hair colouring. And what's more the father is and should be free to choose what the children do during his time with them.
When I asked if that would include him shaving the girls heads bald, on a whim.
You said, .*if that's what the kid wanted and the child's PARENT agreed, then yes*.
So now your saying "if that's what the child wants".
But you won't answer the question I asked, Do you feel that a 2 year old could make an informed choice to have their head shaved?
You are very opinionated notanan2 but under scrutiny your opinions don't hold up.

How about you answer me now, since my examples are more comparable to hair chalks than yours. Should mothers always liase with the father before agreeing to a temporary tattoo or face painting?

My husband has taken my kids for hair cuts without me and I didn't know what style the kids would chose till they got back. If they wanted it shaved, fine! So long as it wasnt against school rules OR if it was was done at the start of the long school holidays

The children in the OP didnt get their hair shaved though, just coloured.

I wasn't talking face paint or glitter though!
Answer my question!

Even COUPLES dont do that!
If my other half took one of my girls to a party where there were hsir chalks and temporary tattoos etc I would not expect him to call me at work for a conference before agreeing for them to go ahead..

Does the mother liase with the father every time she agrees to them having their faces painted? Or drops them at a party where there are glitter tattoos etc?

One of the children was only 2 though.
Do you feel that a 2 year old could make an informed choice to have their head shaved?
Should the father not liase with the child's Mother before making such a decision?

My husband often took my kids for hair cuts. Why is a childs hair a mothers domain only?