Gransnet forums

AIBU

Saying but Not Doing . Why?

(7 Posts)
FlyingAiryFairy Sun 12-Jul-26 18:14:18

Fallingstar

Ask your other friend to call or text her about this, you have done your best but this friend sounds a bit like one of my DDs who always dithers over decisions, is very annoying. And if you arrive tomorrow with nothing booked go to her place and order take away!!

I like that idea wink

FlyingAiryFairy Sun 12-Jul-26 18:13:19

Thank you.
I've been going on so much to my partner about this & I just needed a vent & see if any of you have experienced this.
Perhaps she is anxious not to disappoint.
But we are very easy going.

I did ring other friend but she said & she doesn't want to ring her or get into all the texting either!

BoggledMind Sun 12-Jul-26 17:53:50

I think your friend is just worried she will disappoint you and is keen to get it right.

Fallingstar's advice about getting your other friend to speak to her about it sounds really good.

Fallingstar Sun 12-Jul-26 17:46:03

Ask your other friend to call or text her about this, you have done your best but this friend sounds a bit like one of my DDs who always dithers over decisions, is very annoying. And if you arrive tomorrow with nothing booked go to her place and order take away!!

FlyingAiryFairy Sun 12-Jul-26 17:41:36

To sum up she suggested 7 different places & I didn't say no to any!
But she just keeps asking what I think of other places. So trying to be helpful I looked at the menus & reviews & it's been a waste of my time.
If it goes ahead tomorrow I will gently ask why it was so hard to decide.
Strangely she hasn't asked our other friend where she'd like to go at all!

Cossy Sun 12-Jul-26 17:33:37

How very annoying!

FlyingAiryFairy Sun 12-Jul-26 17:32:18

I am a patient person but it has worn thin.
I have a lovely friend of many years who lives in a different city. We also have a mutual friend & tomorrow we're travelling to visit her.
Since months ago she kept asking us to come saying she'd treat us to Afternoon Tea. I said "Lovely but you don't have to pay for us. Will just be good to meet up & go out" She insisted, "My treat".
Fast forward to a few days ago, she messages me asking if I've ever eaten at 'Brown's Hotel'? I reply that I haven't but we could try it there. Next day, she seems to have changed her mind sbout that hotel & asks if I've eaten at 'Smith's Bar'? Again I say no but we could try there then.
Well.........the very next day she asks about eating at another cafe. I have a look & say "Yes please" She says she'll book it. I felt relieved as it was dragging out with lots of texts back & forth.
So I thought she'd booked it but next day she said it was fully booked .
Yet again she starts texting suggesting a different bar. I am now feeling irritated so I just said I'll book it & I booked it for us.

Well you've guessed she messages me again suggesting a different restaurant & by now I'm so annoyed. She completely ignored the fact that'd I'd booked the place she'd actually suggested & we agreed on.

So in my last reply, I said "I'm going to leave it up to you now as you know the area best x" I also suggested she could just surprise us as I'm not a fussy eater.

I have steam coming out of my ears as she replys suggesting a different place.

I haven't replied.
I'm really pi##ed off .
This has been since last Weds & she just can't seem to make a decision.
I didn't want to take over as she'd kept saying she'd book & it's on her.
Is this normal behaviour? It's like she's just saying she's going to arrange lunch but isn't really.
I keep mulling this over & cannot fathom out what's wrong. I'm bewildered.