'Poppers-in' - do you mind???

No!

No 'popping in' allowed at my front door. It's over-famliar behaviour and, in truth, fairly arrogant.

Now, 'popping off' is quite another matter......

I’m nit keen on popping in on anyone and always text or call before arranging to see anyone, just good manners really. Couldn’t not answer the door though sorry.

I have regular poppers-in. . I have no problem at all with that.
But recently, I have been avoiding one. She used to be an interesting person to talk to. She grew up on a farm and would relate country tales to me. I loved that.
She is 86years old and has now found a bf. Farm talk has turned to sex talk and quite honestly I am not interested. I knew her husband. He adored her. That’s beside the point.
I only wish she’d keep her bedroom antics to herself .😂

I'm enjoying this thread!
I really don't like people 'popping in' without warning and seriously thought it might just be me, great to find that others feel the same.

Depends who they are and how long they plan to stay. I don’t offer meals, a cuppa and a biscuit is about it.

I hate poppers in.

Now people have mobile 'phones the old "We just happened to be passing and we thought we'd pop in and say hello" just doesn't wash anymore. Anyway, they hardly ever just say "Hello." They have tea and use up all the milk, eat all your custard creams and spend two hours telling you how wonderful all their relatives are. They always seem to call just before I have got down to tidying, vacuuming and dusting.

Well they have to take me as they find me - which may well mean not out of my dressing gown yet and/or housework visibly needing doing.

I've got a friend who just pops in when passing (though, on the other hand I don't have his contact details - which I find odd). But I accept him - as I know him from "Stand in the Park" movement (ie social groups that met during Lockdown). He obviously was the teacher he said he was and is known as a "local" here. There's another - very "local" in every sense of the word friend who does tell me she's going to pop by and then is probably here for a couple of hours (though we do share a lot of ideas in common and she knows "everyone" - as I think she's what they call "5th generation Welsh" here). I think it's part of how very "local" people are in this area - and so I take both of them as having accepted me here (which is welcome - as I know there are some who certainly havent....) and, in turn, I just pop in in passing on another "(very) local" friend I've made here if I think she might be around...

I guess I take it as you're either "very in or very out" with people in this area. So I'm glad I've got some that I count as "very in" with...

Popping in unannounced is rude

I dont think it used to be regarded as rude?

I am probably biased on this one as my family home used to be a bit @open house@. Still is a bit.
[speech marks not working on my computer]

Popping in unannounced is rude
If you need to visit someone uninvited (eg to drop off something), you ask if it's convenient in advance. And in my opinion, you don't go inside, you drop the thing off, or whatever, on the doorstep, even if invited in.

I live near the bus stop, and a 'friend' has been dropping subtle hints for literally years that she'd like to be able to pop in when she shops - presumably to use the loo or have a cup of tea. There are tea shops and loos within 150yds of mine!

Our families……yes we are ‘blended’ always pre-plan visits as non of like random pop-ins. I confess to not answering the door occasionally if certain neighbours/friends deem to drop by. And I wouldn’t dream of popping in on people either. It also irks me when someone invites us last minute to their birthday event when we already have plans……they somehow display such disdain when we have to refuse………makes me think we’ve been invited last minute to make up the numbers if someone else has dropped out.

It really depends on who the 'popper-in' is. Some are most welcome at any time, and are the sort of people you can be totally honest with and say you need to leave or do something in whatever timeframe. Others are more difficult because they would be very offended by directness and seem immune to hints, but I try to be welcoming all the same. I 'think' I know which of my family and friends are happy to welcome 'poppers-in" and which aren't and try to comply.

I should have mentioned I'm very introverted and social occasions like Christmas are hell on a stick to me!

No, we don’t have ‘poppers in’, thank goodness.

Probably only DS might do it, that’s ok.

I wouldn’t dream of ‘popping in’ to anyone myself.

When I was young, various relatives came by on a Sunday, unannounced, (no phone back then) and expected to be asked to stay for tea. Mum would be making (tinned) salmon sandwiches, tinned peaches and evaporated milk plus bread and butter. And lots of tea.

It was the done thing back then, but not now, not in our house anyway.

I used to have a friend who popped in all the time. She was bored! She would stay on until I had to make an excuse of going out.

She doesn’t do this anymore, since her Dh retired.

All other friends and family always message before to say ‘ok to pop in for a cuppa’. Of course , love to see you.

No, I don't answer the door. I lie on my lounge carpet for five minutes and then get up and go about my business. They can't see me there and after five minutes they should have given up trying.

It depends what’s going on. I used to have an open door policy as I taught privately here too, but since my DH died and health issues, I find I like to be left alone more.
I’m pretty sociable though and am out a lot and am a member of various groups.

Only family do that and very occasionally neighbours. We used to have a neighbour who did it all the time, drove me mad. Funny old bloke, he used to complain about his lovely wife. In the end I would either pretend I had to go out or not answer.

I don’t have anyone that pops in any more.

No!

No! Happy for poppers in at any time.
But I'm from a family who always welcomed people and made them a brew and enjoyed catching up with their news.
There will always be people like yourself and fair play but don't be offended when in the future you miss the company of people you couldn't be bothered to pass the time of day with because you wouldn't open the front door.

I’m afraid these days it depends who it is with me.

I don’t mind as long as it’s not too early (e.g. I’m not still in my dressing gown at 10 past 11) and as long as the house is reasonably tidy.

I do think it’s bad manners not to ring or otherwise check first, though.