... to feel angry about single mother of 11 getting new house built for her!!

Elegran and Movedalot I love Mr soop but he's far too accommodating and polite...he needs to seriously toughen up. I know him too well...I won't be holding my breath.

soop can you do a Margo? (Good Life) She always got things done Seriously I do feel for you, it is so hard when you should be on control but others won't cooperate and simply do their job. Sun is over the yardarm

soop Have a tantrum, stamp your feet, remind them that you are not teenage newly weds, you are mature grownups who want and need your new house soon . You did a lot of the planning yourselves before even involving these laggards, you would like them to get the finger out and start treating you as valuable clients, NOW. And at an affordable cost!

Sometimes you have to stop being reasonable and lose it before they listen to you. When you are normally gentle and ready to compromise, it makes all the more of an impression when you get angry!

harri Much too late for us to produce a cumbersome clutch of children.

soop so disappointing for you, wish I could wave a wand

Bags What's even more miff-making, is that the kitchen suppplier [agreed on a pleasing plan and units eleven weeks ago] haven't advised the builder of the cost [which they promised so to do]. Our specifications seems to have been overlooked/mislaid. It makes us want to weep. Two months plus of to-ing and fro-ing have got us nowhere. Okay, on the grand scale of things, our problem is piddling. It still hurts to be presumed to be a trifle insignificant.
#nobigbuckstobemade

Where, in this furore, is there any mention of the father/fathers of the 11 children?

If they were paying their dues there might not be a need for public housing.

But then again, pigs might fly.

soop

#infactitsbloodywellimpossible

#itshardtomaintainapositiveattitude

After a further seven weeks of waiting and hoping, we've received a new price on the one-bedroom, greatly-scaled-down wee hoos that we hope to build in the orchard. It's still too high. Thinking caps on...stiff upper lip...resolve to maintain the patience of a saint...continue to hope for a break...
Would someone, somewhere, take pity on two easily pleased, never asked for a hand-out old codgers? All legitimate replies from the powers-that-be will be most encouraging.

Thanks.

Iain Duncan Smith

I've no trouble with "not easy to accept"; I'm slightly concerned about the anger mentioned in the title. Somehow I can't get angry about a woman who had her first child at the age of fourteen and now has eleven. I feel sad for her more than anything.

"IDS" ??

That was in answer to your last line question.

I don't believe we are, mal.

Just read the more recent posts and have the following comments:

If we only posted about items where we had all the detailed facts there would not be many posts!

IDS proposed limiting child benefit last autumn so perhaps he is on speaking terms with the person who has left.

I agree with ana that it is not easy to accept that some people get large state handouts when you are struggling to make ends meet in a low paid job. Surely there has to be some responsibility? Are some of you advocating that whatever fecklessness people adopt the rest of us should subsidise?

absent

I don't think anyone is "happy" with the situation; some of us just accept that in a civilised society we have no choice but to support the losers and the incompetents. There will always be some. We can do our best to minimise the problems, but we'll never eradicate the poor sods completely.

Besides, there but for fortune.... who knows?

Maybe the mother or one of the children help out at the stables in return for the stabling and fielding of their horse/s. When I was 16 years old I used to help muck out at a local stable in return for free hacking - it didn't seem like work in fact it was heaven. Another slightly older girl used to muck out, clean tack and do the early morning rides in exchange for free stabling. She had to pay all the vet's fees and half the horse feed of course but doing this enabled her to keep her horse. If she went away on holiday, he was 'mine' for the duration - his name was Robin and quite the nicest horse I've ever known.Sorry gone off the subject of this lady's rehousing. It is unusual to have such a large family, it isn't going to encourage others and just because she is a bit daft you can't take benefits away from small children.
Also, for goodness sake will you all calm down and stop making nasty remarks to each other. It'll end up with people leaving and us all losing this Forum.

It seems to me that we need Jonathan Swift and his Modest Proposal to deal with this issue.

I agree KlicketyB
Perhaps people who are happy with the situation, and do not have a problem with subsidising large families, could support a family in the way we do with children abroad

I doubt many of these families have children to get benefits, although the evidence given at the trial of the parents, whose arson killed six of their children, suggests that some do.

However, all parents receive an increase in their child benefits when they have more children In an overpopulated country and world I can think of no good reason why we should be subsidising childbearing, beyond replacement level.

The argument that always comes up when there is talk of limiting child support to two children is that we should not penalise the parents of larger families because it is the children that suffer but I am sure it is not beyond the bounds of reason to develop a policy that affects the parents but not the children. perhaps the extra child benefit could be seen as a loan that will be repaid through income or a reduction in benefits, including any state pension. after the child reaches 18, rather like the student loan, the supernumary children will, by definition be the younger children so the family will not be penalised while they are still supporting all their children

Considering the cost of rearing a child, plus the sheer hard work it takes, I find it hard to believe that many women keep on having children for the sake of the supposed benefits.
The suggestion of only paying child benefit for the first two children was first mooted some time ago but the member who proposed it is no longer with us. Obviously, her spirit lingers on!

All this makes me think back to my early married years. You didn't get family allowance until the second child - eight shillings - and if you didn't pay your electricity bill it was cut off. We lived in a farmhouse that was tied to DH's job so, no work, no roof above your head. We managed with two very young children and didn't have our third until our life was much more secure.

If things had gone pearshaped we wouldn't have been considered disadvantaged but irresponsible.