Age 16, and can't be asked!

Yes, please let her make her own choices without resentment. You are undoubtedly on her hit list but not right at the top at the moment. How about a loving little notelet telling her you miss seeing her (without pressure) and to pop in for a couple of minutes any time she fancies.

As others have said, give it time and don’t apply pressure of any kind. Our teenage GC, not seen since last August, are actually asking to come to see us! Could, of course, have something to do with old fashioned cooking which they all love.

Whitewave is spot on give your granddaughter a few more years Ginjeannie
It's not personal just a teenager finding her feet and her independence.

Relax for the next 4 years or so and things will be back to normal.

Our 21 year old GS is becoming human again and on Friday sat next to me on the sofa (distanced - large sofa?) enjoying a Chinese takeaway and telling me all about his electronics degree and girl friend.

Our 16 year old grandson was absent doing his own thing in the village - at a friends house. Hopefully we will see him on his mother’s birthday, but I’m not holding my breath?

Surely you do not want her to come for a meal out of duty. Given the choice, a 16-year-old will choose friends over grandparents, she probably leaves it to her dad to tell you in case you try to talk her into it or show your disappointment.

Its her age. Give her another couple of years - perhaps until she reaches 20 and then she will be your little girl again and love to hear you talk about her childhood and eat your gorgeous food.

Also, did you specifically ask her if she would like to come to Sunday lunch, or did you just ask Dad for both of them? If the latter, it’s quite correct that Dad explains her absence. Unless you specifically asked her, I don’t think you can complain that she didn’t make her excuses herself.

The absolutely best way to sour a relationship with a 16 year old is to make something an obligation, and back it up with a guilt trip for non-compliance. I’m sure your granddaughter is very fond of you, but it’s quite possible she hates having to spend a chunk of her Sunday with Dad and grandparents having a ritual meal that she may not normally choose to eat, without any other young people around.

Try another tack. Wait till the weather improves and Covid restrictions lift and invite her and cousins to come and bring friends along to a barbecue in the garden - nothing fancy, just burgers or sausages. Or if you can’t hack that, why not ask her to call in after school one day for cake and a chat on her way home?

We do not have some kind of inbuilt entitlement to our grandchildren’s love or company. I rather admire the young woman for deciding what to do without the whole guilt thing, and all credit to her Dad for upholding her autonomy. Too many people end up miserable in old age because they have lived a life based on obligation to others and guilt if they care for their own well-being.

Spot on Rosies.

I'm sorry your feeling upset but I don't think it's personal

She has been locked down like the rest of us and is now loving her freedom to do what she wants and spend time with her friends
Teenagers can be a bit thoughtless at times and just don't think like we do

Don't take it to heart you know she loves you and that's all that matters she will be back to see you soon I'm sure